IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Some people think that enjoying the present is more important than planning for the future for both countries and individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #future #countries #individuals
Every moment in an individual's
life
 is important. For
this
 growth, whether in the present or
future
. Some people argued that enjoying
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
each moment of
life
 is very important rather than thinking
future
. I totally disagree with
this
 statement . I will discuss the reasons in the ensuing paragraphs.
To begin
 with, there are
plathora
Correct your spelling
plethora
 reasons of
Change preposition
for these
show examples
these situation
Change the determiner
this situation
these situations
show examples
.
Firstly
,
life
 is unpredictable, people do not know what happened in the
future
. If people well planning for the
future
 , they were combat with
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
every situation. Nowadays ,
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
 think that enjoying every moment and they spent a lot of money. For expensive clothes , food and other items
instead
 of saving money.
For example
 folk invest money
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
life
 insurance, it will have
anytime
Replace the word
any time
show examples
 when they needed.
Secondly
, we see
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the
government
Change noun form
government's
show examples
 perspective. It is
necessity
Add an article
a necessity
the necessity
show examples
 to
future
 planning for cities and countries development. When the government could not
organised
Change the verb form
organise
show examples
 their ideas,
it's
Unnecessary verb
it
show examples
 affected both individuals and countries .
For instance
 ,
authority
Add an article
the authority
show examples
 could not planed
economic
Correct article usage
the economic
show examples
 side . In the fourth coming
years
Add a comma
,years
show examples
 citizen suffered economic crises and it would
also
 affected
Correct article usage
the countries
show examples
countries
Change noun form
countries'
country's
show examples
 development.
However
 , some folks are
overthinker
Fix the agreement mistake
overthinkers
show examples
.So , they think coming situation
instead
 of living
this
 beautiful
life
 . It would create health problems . To illustrate ,
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 survey of
Correct article usage
the indian
show examples
indian
Change the capitalization
Indian
show examples
 government , 28% of folks suffered mental health issues because of
tension
Correct article usage
the tension
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
days
Correct quantifier usage
few days
show examples
. In conclusion ,
life
 is shorter so, we live with fun but it is
also
 important to
makes
Change the verb
make
show examples
Add an article
a plan
the plan
show examples
plan
Fix the agreement mistake
plans
show examples
 for
fourthcoming
Correct your spelling
forthcoming
fourth coming
 years to better
lives
Correct pronoun usage
our lives
show examples
.
Submitted by jeetkacha13 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: