It’s important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives, and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks out with the disadvantages?

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it is suggested that taking risks is fetal for both folks' working lives and their personal lives. In my opinion , the fact that taking an adventure brings more advantages than disadvantages . Admittedly, it seems that High-risk stuff often has high returns. At work, some communities make more cash by doing

this

Linking Words

. Not only doing some dangerous jobs at high altitudes but

also

Linking Words

working related to finance,

such

Linking Words

as buying stocks, is in high peril.

Due to

Linking Words

the fact that there are not so many workers doing the same dangerous things as them,

therefore

Linking Words

,they will earn more money after success. In spite of

this

Linking Words

argument，I believe that they succeed because of low-probability events and we should not ignore those who are negatively affected by doing

this

Linking Words

However

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, there are various reasons why I think taking danger in task and activity will bring bad consequences. It is obvious that doing

this

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will bring some happiness but far more danger and harm.

For instance

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,Somebody like to do dangerous sports,

such

Linking Words

as mountain climbing and bungee jumping. The main reason for

this

Linking Words

is that these things make them feel very

exciting

Replace the word

excited

show examples

because they are dangerous.

While

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they use a lot of equipment and build safe facilities to protect their lives when doing

this

Linking Words

stuff, many workers still die or be hurt because of these activities.

In addition

Linking Words

,Doing

this

Linking Words

at a job may cause property losses to the company. Namely,somebody even takes buying stocks and virtual property as their task.

While

Linking Words

some people make money from these activities,more people get bankrupt or suffer loan In conclusion,

Although

Linking Words

big-risk work and personal life may seem to make

our

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

us more happy or earn more wealth, it is more likely to hurt us.

Therefore

Linking Words

, I think the drawbacks of taking risks outweigh the benefits.

Submitted by 457934770 on Mon May 08 2023

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

297 words

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It’s important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives, and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks out with the disadvantages?

Some people think that they can make as much noise as they want, while others think that the amount of noise people make should be strictly controlled. ​ Discuss both views and include your own opinion and examples.​

Some people think that one should plan detailed activities for their leisure time, while others disagree with this view. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own

Many people argue that smoking should be banned due to its harmful effects on human health. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people think that they can make as much noise as they want, while others think that the amount of noise people make should be strictly controlled. Discuss both views and include your own opinion and examples.