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Band 5

Some People Believe That Professionals Such As Doctors And Engineers Should Be Required To Work In The Country Where They Did Their Training.

#people #professionals #doctors #engineers #work #country
Certain professionals have
strong
Add an article
a strong
show examples
 desire to emigrate
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
country
 they
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
received their tertiary education.
This
 means that many nations around the world lose experts,
such
 as healthcare workers, who would be beneficial for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Although
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 some people believe that these experts should not have
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
work
Fix the infinitive
to work
show examples
 overseas so they can contribute to the national
economy
, I believe that licensed individuals should have
freedom
Add an article
the freedom
show examples
 to choose wherever they want to work, so that they can have better
life
Replace the word
living
show examples
 standards and career opportunities. There are those citizens who wish for skilled workers to be occupied in the
country
that
Correct word choice
where
show examples
 they received their advanced training because they are of great importance concerning the national
economy
. Indeed, most of these workers contribute
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
economy
 significantly through higher income tax, which is one of the major revenue sources of nations. A great example
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
 is Cuba, Cuban government utilize tax revenue to upgrade infrastructure or to fund free healthcare, and it is said that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 they have the best healthcare standards in the world.
Conversely
, some people advocate that professionals should be free to immigrate to a developed
country
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 so that they can improve their expertise, which is known as
human
Correct article usage
the human
show examples
 capital flight
phenomena
Fix the agreement mistake
phenomenon
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. Countless qualified men and women have been relocating to
first world
Add a hyphen
first-world
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 countries, as they sought career development by taking part in research programs or attending additional.
For example
, Switzerland is known to be a popular destination for scholars with
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
advance
Replace the word
advanced
show examples
 research stations like CERN, which is known to provide valuable scientific information regarding nuclear physics. To summarize, skilled workers’ contribution to
national
Add an article
the national
show examples
economy
 is vital,
therefore
 community members believe that they should
pursuit
Replace the word
pursue
show examples
 their careers in the
country
that
Correct word choice
where
show examples
 they had graduated. I partially agree with
this
 opinion because no one should be imposed to stay in a place that they want. On the other side, when these scholars participate in research programs in world-renowned institutions, they substantially contribute to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
humanity.
Therefore
, I am on the side of people who believe that scientists should be free to emigrate, as
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
show examples
 are greater.
Submitted by nilze91 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • professionals
  • doctors
  • engineers
  • required
  • training
  • home country
  • cultural
  • linguistic
  • advantages
  • economic impact
  • free
  • another country
  • globalization
  • international collaboration
  • improving
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • experience
  • opinion
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