With the technological development, some people think technology reduce crime, but some people think it encourage crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree and give your own opinion

#development #people #technology #crime

In recent days, there are a lot of evolvements

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technology. Some individuals think that devices would lessen

crimes

although

there are those who consider that

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they

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would increase the possibility of offences. I fully agree with the opinion that the

gadgets

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gadget's

gadgets'

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progress would foster

crimes

and the reasons for it will be elaborated in the enlisted paragraphs.

Firstly

the

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apply

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technological advancement would generate some victims

which

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who

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have not

comprehend

Wrong verb form

comprehended

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about

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apply

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the technical

information

This

is because some

people

would try to deceive these kinds of individuals

such

as children and elderlies for thieving their money by using the gadgets.

For instance

, there was a

gradually

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gradual

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increase in the number of

crimes

in Japan because of

this

advancement, and 80%

victims

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of victims

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are occupied by older

people

and youngsters who do not understand how to use

smartphone

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smartphones

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and PC.

Hence

, these devices make raise of crime rate in the country. Another key point that I would like to emphasize is the fact that adverse

people

easily collect citizens’

information

by using the internet, and

this

would be utilized by offenders to trick individuals.

This

is because a lot of social

organization

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organizations

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such

as the local government and companies have administered enormous data by the internet clouds, and if

people

are able to invade

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apply

show examples

the

data bases

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databases

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, they can obtain huge

amount

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amounts

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information

According to

research done in 2018, 20% of Japanese

crimes

are produced because corporates lost

their

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apply

show examples

essential

information

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about

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their customers In conclusion,

although

the

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apply

show examples

technical

evolvement

Replace the word

evolution

show examples

can induce some beneficial impacts on reducing crime, the tech would be exploited to offend.

Therefore

, I completely agree with

this

view.

Submitted by shimamura0116 on Wed May 10 2023

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

272 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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With the technological development, some people think technology reduce crime, but some people think it encourage crime. To what extent do you agree or disagree and give your own opinion

The gap between rich and poor is growing. What problems does this create? What can be done to tackle this.

Traditions are about the past and innovation is about the future, and it has been argued that we need to let go of traditions for the sake of progress. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this? What role should traditions have in our lives?

In today’s society people tend to buy many things and throw them away even though they can still be used. What are some causes of this behaviour? What are some effects? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.