IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Many animal species in the world are becoming extinct nowadays. Some people say that countries and individuals should protect these animals from dying out, while others say we should concentrate more on problems of human beings. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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In the 21st century, one of the most controversial issues related to governments'
protection
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 of both purposes, namely
citizens
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 and
animals
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. The core issue lies in the fact that people's thoughts and minds are opposite different. On the one hand, individuals argue for the opinion that
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animals
Change the noun form
animal
show examples
protection
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 is decisive and ensuring
protection
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 could be the main aim of government these days. Notwithstanding, a minority of people have diametrically opposite points of view. They advocate the idea of a hundred per cent concentration on human beings' problems. Even though there are tough comparisons regarding the two facts of
citizens
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' claims, in
this
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 essay I will discuss both angles of view and will substantiate my own opinion
according
Add the preposition
toaccording
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 the problem of the existent controversy.
To begin
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 with, it is crucial to emphasise that several days ago I wrote an article from "The New York Times" about the
overall
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 environmental situation around the entire world. The major reason I have read about
is
Correct pronoun usage
this is
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 the difference between
citizens
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' attitudes. The observer made a survey where it could be clearly seen that the vast majority of individuals tend to think exceptionally about their
life
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 attitudes and desires, rather than about the
animals
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'
protection
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 from dying out which is the most vital thing, without a shadow of a doubt. They elucidate
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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as
Change preposition
apply
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the importance of
future
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 development that could be made
according to
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 the substantial contribution of the government side. Meanwhile, the minority tend to advocate the opposite opinion:
animals
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'
protection
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 is a vital part of our
life
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, especially if speculating about the
future
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. To delve into history, it is evident that our entire started with
animals
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 and our mission is an acceleration of gaining knowledge about the facts of our history.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the most essential purpose of
citizens
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 is to open the eyes of the government and to spread wise opinions regarding
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animals
Change the noun form
animal
show examples
protection
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. We need to demonstrate the minority of the participation in the survey and to find the most initiative people who advocate especially in order to the
life
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 of
future
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 generations which will utilise the new level of
life
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. I reckon that the prospectives of solving the above-mentioned problem is exclusively the
life
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 of our
future
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 children and generation in general.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • cascading effects
  • economic impacts
  • ecosystem
  • endangered species
  • environmental conservation
  • human welfare
  • moral duty
  • preserve
  • sustainable practices
  • habitats
  • interconnected
  • extinction
  • advocates
  • opponents
  • priority
What to do next:
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