The graph shows the rate of smoking among men and women in Somaliland

The graph shows the rate of smoking among men and women in Somaliland
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The graph shows the rate of smoking among men and women in Somaliland
The provided bar graph depicts data regarding the proportion
old
Change preposition
of old
show examples
individuals in three nations from 1980 to 2030 ( Units are measured in percentages) It can be concluded from the given information that, in 1980,
Germany
Use synonyms
owned the highest index in
share
Add an article
the share
a share
show examples
of elderly human beings
while
Linking Words
Canada showed the lowest rate of population among elderly people It is
explicity
Correct your spelling
explicitly
observed that
,
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apply
show examples
Germany
Use synonyms
and UK stood at
approximetely
Correct your spelling
approximately
15
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
for elderly citizens.But 10% of
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
65 and over accounted for Canada.In
following
Add an article
the following
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year, a rise of 15% was seen in Canada and
Germany
Use synonyms
increased from 15% to 20%
whereas
Linking Words
in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
the per cent of elderly civilians increased slightly in 2000. It is predicted that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the proportion of old people will grow
about
Change preposition
by about
show examples
25% in 2030.
Overall
Linking Words
, only
Germany
Use synonyms
stood at the highest point between 1980 and 2000. Another prediction is that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
rate will not change in 2030.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words germany with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "stood" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • distribution
  • disparity
  • trends
  • cultural factors
  • social factors
  • economic factors
  • comparative analysis
  • awareness campaigns
  • health implications
  • interventions
  • correlation
  • lifestyle choices
  • health behaviors
  • significantly
  • narrowing
  • widening
  • impact
  • influencing
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