IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Many people no longer read newspapers or watch TV news programmes. Instead they get news about the world from the Internet. Is this a positive or negative development?

#people #newspapers #tv #news #programmes #world #internet #development
In
this
 modern era, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
socities
Correct your spelling
societies
 prefer to seek the actual
news
 through the
Internet
instead
 of
read
Wrong verb form
reading
show examples
 newspapers or
watch
Wrong verb form
watching
show examples
 TV
news
 programmes. In my opinion,
this
 is a negative development which can influence the crowd
become
Fix the infinitive
to become
show examples
 addicted to their
gadget
 and is potentially harmful since not all of
news
Add an article
the news
show examples
 on the
Internet
 can be trusted. One serious problem that can rise society to spend plenty
hours
Change preposition
of hours
show examples
 scrolling
their
Change preposition
through their
show examples
gadget
 to obtain the latest
news
.
This
 situation will impact to them
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
become addicted to their
gadget
 in order to keep
update
Wrong verb form
updated
show examples
 with the actual
information
. It is harmful
for
Change the preposition
to
show examples
 their health especially in
term
Fix the agreement mistake
terms
show examples
 of
eye sight
Correct your spelling
eyesight
show examples
due to
 the blue light
that is
 transferred from
gadget
Fix the agreement mistake
gadgets
show examples
 to our eyes.
Therefore
, the number of
folk
Change to a plural noun
folks
show examples
 who
using
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
 glasses
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increase
Fix the agreement mistake
increases
show examples
 over
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time. Another issue is that not all of
news
Add an article
the news
show examples
 from the
Internet
 provides
a trusted
Remove the article
trusted information
a piece of trusted information
show examples
information
 which is called a hoax. It might
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
happen since many people can create their own
news
 and post on the
Internet
 without
have
Change the verb form
having
show examples
 to receive
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
permission. It is harmful
for
Change the preposition
to
show examples
 people's life if they can not
selected
Change the verb form
select
show examples
 appropriate
news
 from credible
account
Fix the agreement mistake
accounts
show examples
 that share
this
information
.
For example
, in early 2020 when COVID-19 outbreaks around the world, there were many
hoax
Change to a plural noun
hoaxes
show examples
 on the
Internet
 that impacted
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the majority of people became panicked.
To sum up
, individuals must be mindful in order to obtain
a
Remove the article
news
a piece of news
show examples
news
 from the
Internet
, so they can avoid
became
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
 addicted and
receive
Wrong verb form
receiving
show examples
a vague
Remove the article
vague information
a piece of vague information
show examples
information
.
Therefore
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should make a regulation to give
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
punishment for society or
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
spread
Wrong verb form
spreading
show examples
a hoax
Remove the article
hoax news
a piece of hoax news
show examples
news
 on the
Internet
.
Submitted by nini on

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