The number of cars has increased significantly in major cities. What problems does this cause and what are some solutions to these problems?

#cars #cities

In these modern days, some

people

prefer watching

movies

on the screens of their phones and tablets rather than on

screens

Correct article usage

the screens

show examples

of a

cinema

while

others say the

film

should be seen in a

cinema

to completely enjoy it. In the bellow essay, I will debate both arguments

as well as

my point of view. On the one hand,

seeing

Verb problem

watching

show examples

film

on personal gadgets

such

as phones has the option for

people

to watch in any situation. There are lots of free time and conditions that

people

could fill by seeing

films

For example

, many

people

spend a couple of hours commuting every day by train or bus and it is a suitable time to watch

movies

Also

, old

film

fans can download their popular

movies

and watch them whenever and

where ever

Correct your spelling

wherever

show examples

they want. Many brilliant

films

that were produced in the past which are not showing in cinemas anymore are available as simply as tapping on

tablet’s

Change noun form

tablet

show examples

screens.

On the other hand

, seeing

films

in a

cinema

has some extraordinary features for audiences. The quality of

pictures

Correct article usage

the pictures

show examples

as well as

the well-designed

surrounding

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

sound systems in the cinemas makes it more enjoyable. 3d pictures

for

Add the comma(s)

, for

show examples

example, give

film

fans an exceptional experience of watching

films

in the cinemas.

In addition

, watching

films

in the

cinema

has an important positive impact on relationships.

For instance

, families and friends can watch the

movies

in the

cinema

together to have fun and some amazing times. I would argue that both ways of watching

films

individually on the phone or with your friends and families, even alone in the

cinema

, have some merits and demerits and it entirely depends on the condition. In conclusion, I understand why

people

might want to watch

movies

in the

cinema

, but it seems to me that watching

movies

on phones and tablets is more desirable in these modern days.

Submitted by omidateur on Sun May 28 2023

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task response

The essay partially addresses the task, but the arguments are not fully developed. The response lacks depth and fails to provide a thorough analysis of both perspectives.

coherence cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are present and effective. The main points are generally supported with examples, but the essay lacks coherence in connecting the ideas and arguments.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

313 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Traffic congestion
Commute
Air pollution
Environmental degradation
Health issues
Road accidents
Vehicle density
Urban sprawl
Green spaces
Noise pollution
Public transportation
Non-motorized transport
Congestion charges
Traffic management
Carpooling
Electric/hybrid vehicles
Urban planning
Emissions
Cyclist lanes
Pedestrian zones
Infrastructure

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The number of cars has increased significantly in major cities. What problems does this cause and what are some solutions to these problems?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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