This diagram below shows how electricity is generated in a hydroelectric power station. Summaries the information by selectiong and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#electricity #power #station #summaries #information #selectiong #features #comparisons

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This

Linking Words

graph illustrates how hydroelectric power

station

Fix the agreement mistake

stations

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can be produced electricity.

This

Linking Words

writing will be done by giving a big picture and the details of

flow

Add an article

the flow

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Overall

Linking Words

, hydroelectricity

produced

Add a missing verb

is produced

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from

river

Add an article

the river

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and it will

processing

Change the verb form

process

be processing

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in the morning to afternoon.

While

Linking Words

the process will be stopped at night. In

this

Linking Words

process, there is one machine that will be used, a generator. It contains three main processes.

Firstly

Linking Words

, the

water

Use synonyms

from

river

Add an article

the river

a river

show examples

is flowing to the dam, which will be opened

Change preposition

show examples

day

Correct article usage

the day

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then

Linking Words

it will

taking

Wrong verb form

take

show examples

the

water

Use synonyms

into

Change preposition

for

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power generation.

Secondly

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

liquid will be processed in

generator

Correct article usage

the generator

show examples

and

Linking Words

finally

Add a comma

,finally

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the power lines will be produced. At night, the generator

not

Add a missing verb

is not

show examples

operated and there are two stages to the

water

Use synonyms

turn back.

First,

Linking Words

the

water

Use synonyms

will be pumped into

high-level

Correct article usage

a high-level

show examples

reservoir.

Last

Linking Words

, the

water

Use synonyms

will

be stayed

Change to the active voice

stay

have stayed

show examples

at the pipe because the dam is closing during

this

Linking Words

time. The process will be repeated the same every day during

day

Correct article usage

the day

show examples

and night.

Submitted by twiggseducationbdg on Wed May 31 2023

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: Replace the words water with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

162 words

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This diagram below shows how electricity is generated in a hydroelectric power station. Summaries the information by selectiong and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Some students choose to work or travel after leaving school and before going to university. Many people, however, say that working experience is more useful in adult life than travel. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

The popularity of electric vehicles is rising. Explore the benefits and drawbacks of widespread electric vehicle adoption and discuss potential challenges in transitioning from traditional to electric transportation.