young people know about international pop and movie stars but know less about famous historic people. what are the reasons of this and what can be done to solve the problem.

#people #pop #movie #stars

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It is been concern that youngster knows about international pop and film stars.

However

Linking Words

, there is not

much

Correct quantifier usage

many

show examples

of them familiar with historic people. The principle factor is that

media

Use synonyms

controlling

Wrong verb form

controls

show examples

the most trend nowadays,

while

Linking Words

historical

Add an article

the historical

show examples

story has the least proactive promotion to the public. In fact, social

media

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as Facebook and Instagram has a significant impact on society. It changed the way how teenager spends their leisure time. These platforms are easy to access information and most of them are entertaining videos and pictures.

For instance

Linking Words

, the film industry

promote

Change the verb form

promotes

show examples

their

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

celebrities through Facebook, or pop stars release new songs on Youtube.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, the method of gaining history which is in school for most youngsters.

Moreover

Linking Words

, the amount of learning time is fewest than scrolling social

media

Use synonyms

, it is just a few hours a week in history lessons.

According to

Linking Words

the behaviour of the public, there is a solution that can solve the issue considerably. The main method is to change the teaching platform into modern

media

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, educators and authorities could create videos about historic celebrities on Youtube, utilizing social sites

allow

Fix the infinitive

to allow

show examples

them to reach their target audience.

In addition

Linking Words

,it would be beneficial on hiring a famous creator who

assit

Correct your spelling

assists

the

Change preposition

with the

show examples

production.

Therefore

Linking Words

, these videos could provide interesting information that

attracting

Wrong verb form

attracts

show examples

Correct article usage

an audience

show examples

audience

Fix the agreement mistake

audiences

show examples

familiar with

histirical

Correct your spelling

historical

fame. In conclusion, teenagers are spending most of

Correct pronoun usage

their times

show examples

times

Fix the agreement mistake

time

show examples

on social

media

Use synonyms

which delivers entertaining trends rather than educational materials. In

this

Linking Words

situation, it is acknowledged that the responsibility of schools and governments is important.

Submitted by yipcm202 on Tue Jun 06 2023

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

258 words

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young people know about international pop and movie stars but know less about famous historic people. what are the reasons of this and what can be done to solve the problem.

Today more and more people are using computers and electronic devices to access information. Thus, there is no need to print newspapers, books, or magazines anymore. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In order to become a successful sportsperson, some people argue that you need to have access to the latest technology and the most up-to-date equipment. Other people believe that these things are not necessary for sporting success. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, abd have health problems as a result. Why do man working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem?

Some people believe that if a police force carrying guns, it would cause a higher level of violence in that society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Today more and more tourist are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places.