IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

#people #information #research #business #world
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Many individuals suggest that there should be no limitation on
data
Use synonyms
 contribution in different fields of science, trade and the scientific world.
While
Linking Words
on the other hand
Linking Words
, a group of the population consider it too risky to share any sort of knowledge without considering possible detrimental impacts on societies. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, both ideas will be discussed and, in the end, I will represent my point of view as well.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there are countless publications and scientific organizations which release freely any sort of
data
Use synonyms
 regardless of its value. Many individuals find these
data
Use synonyms
 valuable for their progress in business or research.
For example
Linking Words
, the Up-to-Date application which is a medical resource for diseases and treatments, releases unlimited
data
Use synonyms
 from the newest scientific discoveries monthly.
As a result
Linking Words
, all of the physicians are able to access
this
Linking Words
 valorous knowledge free of charge globally and give the best possible care to their patients.
Consequently
Linking Words
, providing valuable information leads to a better healthcare system and a safe world.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, there is a disagreement about the free availability of
data
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, there are lots of efforts and financial support to publish a scientific article
for example
Linking Words
. Many argue that it is not fair to release
this
Linking Words
 information freely because
in
Add the comma(s)
,in
show examples
 the long term, it might become not cost-effective to research in high-tech and expensive fields.
Secondly
Linking Words
, there always is a big concern over any abuse of information by some criminals.
For instance
Linking Words
, valuable experiments and techniques in the nuclear plant are considered highly sensitive intelligence which must be protected from terrorist organizations at any cost.
To conclude
Linking Words
, despite some respected concerns over the free accessibility of
data
Use synonyms
, in my perspective, the number of positive outcomes from free
data
Use synonyms
 sharing like a healthier world definitely outweigh its opponent’s point of view.
Submitted by m.lotfipour92 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • information sharing
  • scientific research
  • business
  • academic world
  • advancement of knowledge
  • progress
  • collaboration
  • cross-disciplinary research
  • open access
  • democratization of information
  • transparency
  • credibility
  • intellectual property
  • security concerns
  • commercial interests
What to do next:
Look at other essays: