the graph below shows the number off shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

the graph below shows the number off shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.
The line chart comprehensively illustrates the
figure
of
Change preposition
for
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store
discontinuations and emerges in seven years from 2011 to 2018. It is evident from the graph that the
figure
of
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for
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closures and openings of
store
Fix the agreement mistake
stores
show examples
exhibited a decreasing pattern over the period shown.
Overall
,
store
discontinuations had the lowest
figure
while
openings of
store
experienced the greatest
figure
. Around 6500
store
Fix the agreement mistake
stores
show examples
were out of business at the beginning of the period. In 2012, the
figure
of
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for
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store
closures was recorded at 6000. The quantity increased significantly to 7000 in 2013.
Then
, the
figure
dropped dramatically to around 6300 and approximately 500 in 2014 and 2015, respectively. The following year, the
store
discontinuations significantly soared to just above 5000. The
figure
of
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for
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store
closures dropped slightly to 5000 in 2017 and surpassed just above 5000
at the end
of the duration. Around 8500
store
Change to a plural noun
stores
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emerged in 2011.
Then
, the
figure
had a significant decrease in 2012 to 4000. After that, the
figure
inclined significantly to 5000 and 6000 in 2013 and 2014, respectively. The quantity of
store
openings decreased to 4000 and
then
levelled off in 2017.
At the end
of the period, the
figure
of
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for
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emerging
Correct article usage
the emerging
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store
Fix the agreement mistake
stores
show examples
declined to 3000.
Submitted by rizalpriambudi95 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end".
Vocabulary: Replace the words figure, store with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 10 times.
Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 4 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • trend
  • fluctuation
  • peak
  • decline
  • surge
  • stabilize
  • correlation
  • economic conditions
  • consumer behavior
  • technological advancements
  • urban development
  • employment
  • retail sector
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