IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

In many countries there is a shortage of suitable people for essential jobs. What do you think are the causes of this problem and what measure could be taken to solve?

#countries #shortage #people #jobs #measure
Staff
shortage
 has long been a discussed issue, particularly in relation to the lack of high-tech
workers
such
 as doctors, lawyers, and engineers,
as well as
 low-tech
workers
 performing repetitive tasks. In
this
 essay, I will illustrate the underlying reasons for
this
shortage
 and offer viable solutions. The
shortage
 of high-tech
workers
 can be attributed, in part, to structural problems within the educational system, where universities often lack sufficient government support to produce graduates in specific fields. The production of high-tech
workers
 is an expensive
endeavor
Change the spelling
endeavour
show examples
, and one possible solution is for the government to allocate additional budgets to departments aligned with industry trends.
However
, it is important to note that
this
 approach may lead to increased tax pressure on individuals. Another major reason for the
staff
shortage
 is that people tend to overestimate their abilities.
While
 it is undeniable that contemporary students receive
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
 education than those in the past,
this
 often leads to a belief that they deserve higher-level positions, resulting in fewer individuals willing to take on menial or repetitive jobs. Introducing a gap year in the middle of college could help students gain a better understanding of their true value and potential,
although
this
 would require extending the duration of college by an extra year.
Lastly
, and perhaps most significantly, the issue of low wages in these jobs contributes to the
staff
shortage
.
Although
this
 problem cannot be solved in the short term, the invisible hand of the free economic market will gradually increase wages for essential jobs. In conclusion, addressing the
staff
shortage
 requires a comprehensive approach.
While
 it may not be resolved immediately, revising strategies for distributing additional budgets, promoting self-awareness of personal value, and gradually increasing wages are necessary steps towards resolving
this
 problem.
Submitted by almeric923 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: