IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#visitors #attractions
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It is true that there are some people who suggest that overseas visitors should pay more than local citizens to visit cultural areas in the country.
This
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 essay totally disagrees with that statement; I believe that it wouldn't be fair for the reasons below. One of the many reasons why
this
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 is a bad idea is that it will discourage tourists from visiting
such
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 locations especially if they knew they'll have to pay more than others;
therefore
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, the amount of money that these attractions receive would be less,
as a result
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, local councils won't have enough resources to take care and maintain these national treasures.
Moreover
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, most individuals who visit
such
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 historical places are foreigners;
thus
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, it would be illogical to charge their usual customers with extra cash,
for example
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, a documentary aired
last
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 year on CNN about the Statue of Liberty in the USA, showed that most sightseers are from another country. Another argument is that it will affect the tourism industry of the country badly in the long run as tourists will no longer have the urge to be there, and a lot of governments throughout the world depend on that,
as a consequence
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, the nation's economy will be compromised.
furthermore
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, sightseers prefer particular destinations from others based on the kind of treatment that they find there,
hence
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, if they are not pleased with what they receive, there is a good chance that they'll never be back;
therefore
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,
this
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 idea is not really helping in
this
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 matter
To conclude
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, for the reasons mentioned above, I believe that it is wrong to force foreign visitors to pay more than local ones.
Submitted by saberyouc on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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