The obesity rates among teenagers have increased dramatically in many developed countries. Discuss some possible reasons for this increase and suggest solutions.

Looking at the recent number of
obesity
among
teenagers
, especially in developed countries, has been very concerning. A lot of supporting factors that make
this
possibly occur
such
as lacking awareness of healthy
lifestyle
, massive advertising of fast
food
and high sugar
food
products
that can cause
obesity
as well as
cultural
perception
in some countries that 'big is beautiful' that somehow incorrectly preached, though it can boost
teenagers
confidence. Lacking awareness of healthy lifestyles and massive advertising of high-sugar
products
might be actually interconnected. With the tight competition among fast-moving consumer goods, many companies, specializing in
food
and beverage, consistently bombard our society to keep purchasing their goods. Bombarding society with massive advertising may not be wrong, but conveying the advertisement without a disclaimer that their
products
may contain high sugar can be definitely dangerous. Research shows that an unhealthy
lifestyle
usually starts from high consumption of sugar
products
and worse can cause addiction to our
body
. Meanwhile, cultural
perception
also
plays a role. We should understand that everyone is different yet beautiful no matter your colour, race, sex,
body
size and etc.
However
, speaking of
body
size, society
also
should change their
perception
that being big, which is often associated with
obesity
, is not always beautiful if the person consistently consumes high-sugar
food
without balancing with vegetable consumption, physical exercise, and other healthy lifestyles. There are some possible solutions that may contribute to decreasing
obesity
rates.
First,
the government as a policymaker should encourage or even require all companies to
also
insert a disclaimer in the advertisement that consuming the
products
may cause
obesity
in the long run when it is consumed consistently. Just like cigarette
products
for adult consumers, I believe the government has successfully applied a great regulation to decrease the consumption of it. In order to change the cultural
perception
, definitely takes a longer time than the first one, it can start from school to educate
teenagers
about what matters is not
body
size, but what matter is about having a healthy
lifestyle
. It is okay to be big as long as you have a healthy
lifestyle
. In conclusion, the awareness of healthy lifestyles among
teenagers
should be significantly improved.
Submitted by rashrishrush on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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