Some people think that children should follow their parent’s advice, however, others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In most
culture
Fix the agreement mistake
cultures
show examples
, people are teaching
children
to
listen
Add the preposition
tolisten
show examples
their
parents
.
However
, It is
agured
Correct your spelling
argued
agreed
that offspring should follow the suggestion
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
their
parents
,
while
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
consider the drawback that they cannot learn
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
critical thinking. In my opinion, the benefits of listening to
parents
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
outweight
Correct your spelling
outweighed
outweigh
Correct article usage
the downside
show examples
downside
Fix the agreement mistake
downsides
show examples
, because they are experienced elder
figure
Fix the agreement mistake
figures
show examples
for
youngerster
Correct your spelling
youngsters
to learn.
Grown up
Add a hyphen
Grown-up
show examples
people have been
went
Change the verb form
going
gone
show examples
throught
Correct your spelling
through
more
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
show examples
than
youngerster
Correct your spelling
youngsters
, parent
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
have
Add the particle
tohave
show examples
know more than
children
Correct pronoun usage
their children
show examples
because of their life
experience
Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
show examples
.
However
,
children
lack
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
experience than
adult
Fix the agreement mistake
adults
show examples
who can indicate their
children
to make a better choice.
For instance
,
children
would spend their time on entertaining activities and escape
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
academic learning. In
this
case,
parents
could provide advice which only
focus
Change the verb form
focuses
show examples
on how to manage
Correct your spelling
their
thier
Correct your spelling
their
learning and leisure time
Submitted by yipcm202 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: