Some people think that it is more beneficial to take part in sports which are played in teams, like football, while other people think that taking part in individual sports, like tennis or swimming, is better. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #part #sports #teams #football #tennis

As a human being who wants to get fit from time to time,

sports

play a big role to make us healthy. There are numerous

type

Fix the agreement mistake

types

show examples

sports

this

world, yet, it can be divided into two sections, individual and

team

sports

While

there are still debates over which type is better, here I would like to describe my views on both types and choose which one is better. Swimming, tennis,

Correct word choice

and

show examples

even running are several

sports

that consider

Change preposition

apply

show examples

individual

sports

. In

this

type of

sports

Fix the agreement mistake

sport

show examples

, our success is highly dependent on our performance and determination to achieve our goals. If the athletes want to be the winner, they must train harder than anyone else and set the goal as high as they can. Our achievements are not relying on outside factors.

For example

, Usain Bolt

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a runner from Jamaica, always comes to the training earlier and trains as hard as he could.

Therefore

he achieves several medals at the Olympics.

On the other hand

team

sports

such

as basketball and football count heavily on teamwork. Even though each individual has tremendous skills, if they cannot work as a

team

, their

team

will fail. As social creatures,

human

Add an article

a human

the human

show examples

cannot

life

Replace the word

live

show examples

on their own, our

life

will

be depends

Change the verb form

depend

show examples

on someone.

Therefore

, teamwork will be one of the

key

Change to a plural noun

keys

show examples

for us to survive not only in

sports

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

in our entire

life

. To summarize, both individual and

team

sports

have their own benefits,

however

, to achieve more in

sports

and

also

in our

life

, I rather

Remove the marker

apply

show examples

choose

team

sports

Submitted by nadiasyifaa on Sat Jun 24 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

263 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

cooperation
team spirit
sense of belonging
community
leadership
trust
collective responsibility
dependency
self-reliance
self-discipline
goal setting
tailored development
flexibility
social support

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4
band
The best way to solve the world’s environmental problems is to raise the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It has been observed that the Earth struggle with the nummerous issues such as air , noise and different types of pollutions by transports . Although some people believe that increasing the value of petrol for vehicles is the best path for the sollution of this problems. I agree with the given statement. My incilination is elaborated in ensuing paragraph and relevant examples .
<4
band
Language teachers should concentrate on giving positive feedback to students when they do good work, rather than on criticising bad work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
I do disagree if language teachers only concentrate to give positive feedback for good work to students rather than criticising the bad work for the reason to building students' knowledgement even to advance the language skill, criticising to bad work is another level for language teachers to showing if students have finished in wrong way. If students always have positive feedback without knowing the wrong result of their work, the students will never know the mistake for what they've done. Criticising can't be assumed to make the students in down level, but it supports their works must be better in future. They must understand which is the good work and the bad work, in this reason they improve their skill.
4.5
band
Under British and Australian laws a jury in a criminal case has no access to information about the defendant's past criminal record. This protects the person who is being accused of the crime. Some lawyers have suggested that this practice should be changed and that a jury should be given all the past facts before they reach their decision about the case. Do you agree or disagree?
Law juries in the United Kingdom and Australia can not be permitted to approach the previous criminal history of accused people. However, some legal professionals call for a change in this process. They expressed their opinion that it is necessary to be disclosed for the judges before making any informed decision. In my opinion, I also agree with the given suggestion. In
5
band
Today family members eat fewer meals together. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative trend?
For some reason nowadays people seldom get together to have meals with their families. Compared with the past, there are some attraction and activities that people think is more important. To support my statement, this essay will interpret my view and related reasons.
7.5
band
Wealthy countries should accept more refugees and provide them with basic assistance, such as food and housing. To what extend do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that developed countries should allow more evacuees to enter their borders and give them primary support, such as food and shelter. The essay agrees with this statement because rich countries are capable enough to support these kind of people.

Some people think that it is more beneficial to take part in sports which are played in teams, like football, while other people think that taking part in individual sports, like tennis or swimming, is better. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The best way to solve the world’s environmental problems is to raise the cost of fuel for cars and other vehicles. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Language teachers should concentrate on giving positive feedback to students when they do good work, rather than on criticising bad work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Today family members eat fewer meals together. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative trend?

Wealthy countries should accept more refugees and provide them with basic assistance, such as food and housing. To what extend do you agree or disagree?