many doctors say that people in today's world do not do enough physical exercise. what do you think are the causes of this? what solutions are there to this problem?

#doctors #people #world #exercise

Expertise

claim

Correct subject-verb agreement

claims

show examples

that the majority of the masses do not perform exercises on a regular basis. The causes and the possible remedies for

this

issue will be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs. The first and foremost reason for

this

unhealthy development is a busy lifestyle.

In other words

, in the race

of becoming

Change preposition

to become

show examples

more successful and conquer rivals, individuals are merely attentive towards their health.

For instance

, after the physical and mental stress at the workplace, a person is left with no energy

for devoting

Change preposition

to devote

show examples

to their physique.

Moreover

, overdependency on innovations and preference for a comfort zone is the main concern for youngsters. Even for covering, a few miles dwellers prefer to drive vehicles

instead

of cycling or walking. Turning to the solutions, to cure certain problems there is a need for collective efforts of employers and the high authorities.

Initially

, owners ought to spread awareness regarding the detrimental impacts of not performing workouts or other activities regularly.

For example

, employers must be provided with lessons and they should be monitored regularly

for maintaining

Change preposition

to maintain

show examples

the good physique of workers. Despite

this

, the federal body ought to limit the use of automobiles, when people have been travelling nearby. In conclusion, doctors are worried about the consequences of a poor lifestyle, which is mainly

due to

the latest technology or hectic

schedule

Fix the agreement mistake

schedules

show examples

. The implementation of strict laws and acknowledging adults about its long-term impact needs to be done by the ruling bodies .

Submitted by jhajjravneet9 on Tue Jun 27 2023

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task response

Ensure the essay addresses all aspects of the given topic, including causes and solutions. Develop each point with specific examples and explanations to provide a comprehensive response to the task.

coherence cohesion

Improve the coherence and cohesion by organizing the ideas in a more logical manner. Use transition words and phrases to connect ideas and paragraphs more effectively. Additionally, ensure that the introduction and conclusion clearly summarize the main points of the essay.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

242 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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many doctors say that people in today's world do not do enough physical exercise. what do you think are the causes of this? what solutions are there to this problem?

Your opinion

Nowadays more and more people have access to the internet. However, constant availability of any information worsen people's memory and critical thinking skills. Agree or disagree.

Some say that because many people are living much longer, the age at which people retire from work should be raised considerably. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, people are spending more time away from their homes because they spend longer in their work place. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

Bullying is a big problem in many schools. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

32.Some people say that art (e.g. painting, music, poetry) can be made by everyone whereas others believe that it can be only made by those with special ability. Discuss both views and give your opinion.