Some people say the government is wasting money on arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some individuals think the authority is wasting
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
budget on funding
arts
and that
this
money
could be best
allocate
Wrong verb form
allocated
show examples
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
important
serivces
Correct your spelling
services
for the public. I totally agree with
this
statement, because
arts
dose
Correct your spelling
does
show examples
not play a significant role in society,
then
this
money
should spend to improve people living standards and
addressing
Wrong verb form
address
show examples
environmental issues.
To begin
with, there are several reasons why I believe
governments
Fix the agreement mistake
government
show examples
funding for
arts
is
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
show examples
of
money
.
Firstly
,
arts
namely, museum, music,
painting
Correct word choice
and painting
show examples
dose
Correct your spelling
does
show examples
not
provides
Change the verb form
provide
show examples
vital services to normal people, which means these
arts
only
Add a missing verb
are only
show examples
for
entertainments
Fix the agreement mistake
entertainment
show examples
.
Furthermore
, artists should support themselves by
sell
Change the verb form
selling
show examples
their artworks
instead
of
dependent
Add a missing verb
being dependent
show examples
on government funding.
For example
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
musicians can earn
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
money
through
sells
Wrong verb form
selling
show examples
tickets
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
music performances.
Secondly
, the authorities should spend the
money
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
taxes in
wisely
Change the word
wise
show examples
ways rather wasting
this
funds on
arts
. They should spend
money
in order to improve infrastructure
such
as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
education, healthcare,
public
Correct word choice
and public
show examples
transport, which
this
infrastructure can provide
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
quality of living standards for people and make them satisfied
about
Change preposition
with
show examples
the
perfomance
Correct your spelling
performance
of the government.
Finally
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
lawmakers should spend more funds in order to tackle
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
environmental issues namely, global warming, climate change,
pollution
Correct word choice
and pollution
show examples
instead
of supporting
arts
Correct article usage
the arts
show examples
.
This
due
Add a missing verb
is due
show examples
to the fact that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
these issues pose a threat to the
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
the earth and
then
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
government should take measures to mitigate it. In conclusion, In my perspective, supporting
arts
is
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
show examples
of
money
, and
then
the governments should utilize the public
budegt
Correct your spelling
budget
in order
serve
Fix the infinitive
to serve
show examples
the public through make
improvments
Correct your spelling
improvements
in infrastructure, and cope with environmental problems.
Submitted by faiz3177 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • enriching society
  • promoting cultural understanding
  • development of talent
  • creative industries
  • economic benefits
  • generate revenue
  • cultural heritage
  • identity
  • prioritize spending
  • needs of the majority
What to do next:
Look at other essays: