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Band 3

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a possitive or a negative development?

#countries #world #people #cities #population #countryside #possitive #development
In many nations around the world, the population in
rural
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a rural
the rural
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area
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areas
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 is declining, it is because
people
 are moving from
countryside
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the countryside
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 to urban areas. I believe that
this
 is a negative development.
To begin
 with, the
city
 become dense because of many rural
people
move
Wrong verb form
moving
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 to the
city
. The more
people
 live in the
city
, the more residential built,
as a
result
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,result
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 green land areas are becoming less because it used for housing areas.
Furthermore
, another negative impact is that there are more and more road users.
Consequently
,
a
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apply
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traffic congestion is
inevitable
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an inevitable
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 problem in the
city
.
In addition
, the negative impact of
aforementioned
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the aforementioned
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 issue is that economic development in the rural area is decreasing. The reason is that individuals
in
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of
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 productive ages who should work or
open
Add a missing verb
have open
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 job vacancies
moving
Wrong verb form
move
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 to the
city
;
thus
,
people
 who live in the
city
 are only
people
in
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of
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 unproductive ages
such
 as children and senior
citizen
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citizens
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.
To sum up
, I personally think that there are
drawback
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drawbacks
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 developments of rural
people
 moving to the urban area. Those are the density of cities and decreasing
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
economic growth in the countryside.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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