In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

#countries #people #work #travel #year #school #university #studies

Taking a year off after high school graduation is an opportunity for

students

to acquire invaluable things

such

as a part-

time

job

and travelling. Some graduates decide to take

this

chance before entering campus life as it offers tremendous benefits. In

this

essay, I will explain both benefits and drawbacks of those actions including proper examples. On the one hand, taking a long

time

prior to educational institution entrance might cause academic delays and insecurities.

Firstly

, the more the

students

postpone studying in a university, the longer the

time

they will have a chance to be accepted. Compared to their peers, they will graduate late from college later. Eventually, it will take a long

time

for them to obtain a career which might cause a delay in their forthcoming professional career.

Moreover

, society may see

this

procrastination more as a negative side.

Students

might be insecure about their cohort's progress and feel ashamed about it.

On the other hand

, travelling or working during a year-off leave after high school graduation will bring several advantages. Travelling, as the first option, can be a sweet escape from academic pressures. By taking a break for a

while

, they are expected to recover from the demanding academic activity.

Secondly

, it will be a golden opportunity to look for themselves and find answers to questions like, "What do I really want to do next?", "What is my passion?", and "What am I capable of?" Those searching will help them to take suitable courses and

trainings

Change the wording

training

pieces of training

show examples

before making

into

Correct pronoun usage

it into

show examples

college. They can

also

use that

time

to do research about life on campus, like the weather, the culture, and local communities. Those preparations will help them to adapt smoothly to a university’s learning environment.

Moreover

, the second option could be working during the gap as it offers many advantages. Having a

job

, either as a full-

time

or a part-

time

job

employee , would be a chance to learn valuable skills in life. Interpersonal,

time

management

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and communication skills are only some samples of the skill set.

Furthermore

, by earning a salary from their

job

, they can use it to pay for their daily needs. Or even better, they can use it for tuition fees and university expenses,

for instance

Finally

, their work experience during the gap would be a nice resume in their curriculum vitae.

This

perfect justification hopefully will showcase

students

’ ability and expertise to get a suitable profession in the future. In conclusion,

while

having a year off after graduation may cause

students

academic delay and insecurities, travelling or working brings more benefits.

Besides

giving

students

time

to recharge their energy, travelling

time

can be used to search for their interests or capabilities and equip themselves to enter the university. The gap is

also

a perfect

time

to develop skills and earn money by having a

job

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Fri Jun 30 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

473 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Cultural immersion
Life experience
Work ethic
Career readiness
Self-discovery
Delayed gratification
Intellectual stagnation
Financial implications
Social dynamics
Academic trajectory

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In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunityto help others. to what extend do yopu agree or disagree

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Some people think that the family is the most important influence on young adults. Other people think that friends are the most important influence on young adults. Which view do you agree with?