IN some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for pepople. Why might this be the case? Do youo think this is a positive or negative situation?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In numerous nations, it is pivotal for individuals to have their own
house
Use synonyms
rather than
renting
Wrong verb form
rent
show examples
it. The primary factors for the topic are
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
security and financial benefits. I believe that
this
Linking Words
is a positive situation to own a
home
Use synonyms
. There are two main reasons why
people
Use synonyms
decided to have their own
home
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, Having their own
home
Use synonyms
means someone
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
not have to pay a
home
Use synonyms
rent, so they do not
need
Add the particle
toneed
show examples
allocate their money to
this
Linking Words
.
This
Linking Words
is beneficial for families where they can allocate their money to other essential goals,
such
Linking Words
as child education and retirement plan.
Secondly
Linking Words
, security is another factor in possessing a resident.
For example
Linking Words
, there are cases in my country
that
Correct word choice
where
show examples
problem arises between tenants and landlords like contract termination in the middle of a rent time, so
people
Use synonyms
force to expel from the
house
Use synonyms
. Possessing a resident
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
positive developments.
People
Use synonyms
will work really hard when they have a goal to own a
home
Use synonyms
. The reason is
because
Replace the word
that
show examples
the price of
Use synonyms
house
Add an article
the house
a house
show examples
is really expensive,
as a consequence
Linking Words
individuals should try to earn
high
Add an article
a high
show examples
income to have a
resident
Replace the word
residence
show examples
quickly.
In addition
Linking Words
, owning a
home
Use synonyms
especially
people
Use synonyms
having more than one
home
Use synonyms
can use their
home
Use synonyms
as a passive income. A
Use synonyms
home owner
Correct your spelling
homeowner
show examples
can rent the
house
Use synonyms
to
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
Use synonyms
people
Fix the agreement mistake
person
show examples
for investment, so
people
Use synonyms
earn multiple
income
Change to a plural noun
incomes
show examples
which is from full-time work and
home
Use synonyms
investing.
To sum up
Linking Words
, owning a
house
Use synonyms
is really important for
people
Use synonyms
rather than renting it. I personally believe that
this
Linking Words
is a positive
develoment
Correct your spelling
development
because it brings financial advantages and a sense of security.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: