Education of young people is highly prioritized in many countries. However, educating adults who cannot write or read is even more important and governments should spend more money on this. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that
governments
should prioritize eliminating illiteracy among adults instead
of focusing solely on educating young people. I completely agree with this
statement and believe that investing in programs to improve adult
literacy
can increase feelings of inclusion and optimize national finances.
One of the primary benefits of adult
literacy
education
is its ability to help illiterate adults integrate into society. Without basic reading and writing skills, people may struggle to access necessary information in their daily lives. For example
, during the COVID-19 pandemic, many immigrants were unable to receive free vaccines provided by the government because they could not understand announcements published by national institutions. This
resulted in a higher infection rate among these individuals which even threatened their lives. However
, if they had basic literacy
skills, they could have obtained better protection, thereby increasing their sense of belonging in the
society.
Another reason why Correct article usage
apply
governments
should prioritize adult
literacy
education
over young student education
is its potential to benefit economic development. Adults are often the main contributors to the local economy, yet illiterate people may have difficulty to find
employment and Change the verb form
finding
make
financial contributions. By investing more in Wrong verb form
making
adult
literacy
programs, governments
can increase employability and tax revenue while
reducing the costs associated with supporting the unemployed. For example
, after the literacy
campaign launched by the Chinese government in 1951, the employability rate in China increased to over 70%, and its gross domestic production saw significant improvement.
In conclusion, I believe that prioritizing adult
literacy
education
is worth to be paid
attention Wrong verb form
paying
by
Change preposition
to by
government
. By investing in programs to improve Add an article
the government
adult
literacy
, governments
can increase feelings of inclusion, improve economic outcomes, and optimize national finances.Submitted by wujita1212 on
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task achievement
Ensure that all main points are supported with relevant examples and evidence.
coherence cohesion
Consider rearranging some sentences or using connective words to improve the logical flow of ideas.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary to provide more precise and varied expressions.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to avoid errors and improve fluency.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite