Individuals should not be allowed to carry guns as it increases crime and violence in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree

There has been a lot of debate about legalizing
firearms
in the Western world. The discussion of whether there will be high crime rates if everyone is permitted to carry weapons is opinionated. I strongly agree that people should not be allowed to own or carry any form of weapon because of the damage it has caused over the years.
Firstly
,
Firearms
have done more damage than good. People no longer carry guns to protect themselves as the case should be, but they now kill for the fun of it.
For instance
, in the United States of America, there is no week that goes without a shooting taking place in a school, club, or somewhere where there is a public gathering. Most of these killings are currently done by kids,
this
is seen more out of anger or retaliation. The government is currently unable to control the situation.
Secondly
, The crime rate has increased
as a result
of the ease of accessing these weapons. The
firearms
are getting into the wrong hands and street gangs are finding legal ways of owning dangerous
firearms
.
For example
, in the 70s Italian
mafia's
Change noun form
mafia
show examples
used their guns to terrorise New Yorkers,
this
was used to collect illegal taxes to
further
their drug sales and human trafficking.
Although
Correct word choice
However
show examples
, people
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
support lesser handgun control have argued that the way to stop the bad guy with a cannon is for the good guys to
then
Rephrase
apply
show examples
have a gun.
However
,
this
only increases the number of guns in society. In conclusion, I strongly believe that weapons should not be easily accessible by any individual. There should be stronger cannon control because the lives of every person matter.
Submitted by osatohanmwenoshodi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
The essay provides a clear response to the given prompt and presents comprehensive ideas. However, the introduction and the conclusion could be more developed to effectively frame the argument.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is generally strong, with clear organization and progression of ideas. However, the introduction and conclusion could be more effectively linked to the body of the essay for better coherence.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: