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Band 4

In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.

#world #life #expectancy #individuals #society #measures #impact #populations
We live in
world
Add an article
a world
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 in which
people
 are longer-lived and have faith in tomorrow.
This
 is the result of the development of medicine and nutrition. Many
people
 think that
this
 tendency has a positive impact
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 our society. Of course, it has some advantages, but, at the same time there are disadvantages too, that cause a variety of problems. In
this
 essay, I will explain the main disadvantages of
this
 trend. To start with, I can say that one of the most important
problem
Change to a plural noun
problems
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 is that average life expectancy influences the economic, political, social, and educational life of a community. It creates an issue for the government,
such
 as if the number of aged
people
increase
Change the verb form
increases
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, the budget for their maintenance will rise too. Another
problem
 is that young
people
 can not find a job because of the aged
people
. Most of them are afraid, as
this
problem
 is relevant for several decades.
Moreover
,
with
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apply
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every year, it becomes a growing
problem
.
However
,
these
Change the determiner
this problem
these problems
show examples
problem
 can be solved by
government
Correct article usage
the government
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. It can draw some laws that would establish suitable rules for both the young and the old. In
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
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 I can say that the world is developing rapidly in the
last
years
Correct quantifier usage
few years
show examples
 and it has some results
such
 as average life expectancy. Even if it has caused some problems for individuals and society, I think
this
 is a
problem
 that could be solved, only if there is a desire.
Submitted by acaitaz on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • average life expectancy
  • developed world
  • increase
  • individuals
  • society
  • personal goals
  • ambitions
  • quality of life
  • leisure
  • recreation
  • healthcare costs
  • challenges
  • healthcare system
  • ageing population
  • shortage
  • available workers
  • economy
  • retirement planning
  • healthy lifestyles
  • investing
  • social support systems
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