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Band 2.5

Some people say that parents have more important roles to play in children development.However, others argue that friends and television have the most significant influence. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #parents #roles #children #development #friends #television #influence
Nowadays, kids get to spend a significant part of their time with their peers and watching tv programmes due
the
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to the
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 fact that guardians have to work in order to provide
to
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for
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 their families.
However
, many argue that
childrens
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children
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 need their parents to be more present, to ensure that their development in life is
the
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apply
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more
adecuated
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adequate
.
Firstly
, I
trully
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truly
 believe that there are several
of
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apply
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educational resources in the tv,
where
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which
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the youngster could take advantage,
to
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of to
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 learn from experts to improve and evolve in knowledge whilst they are enjoying a funny and relaxing
momment
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moment
moments
 in front of the screen. A recent study from the University of Irvine in
Califorfina
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California
, revelated that
in
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apply
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its
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the
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mayority
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majority
 kids are self
thaught
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taught
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 by the influence of television and
electornic
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electronic
 gadgets.
Secondly
, I strongly believe that
,
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apply
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 there is
not
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no
show examples
 better influence in life
that
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than
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 the
parents
Change to a genitive case
parent's
parents'
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roles models, even though guardians spend plenty of hours outside
home
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the home
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, there
are
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is
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 still time on the weekends to enjoy in family and influence
in
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them in
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 a positive way in their
childrens
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children's
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 development, by playing educational games, discovering new hobbies and trying new sports. In resume, I consider that children can take positive advantages by watching tv as well,
by
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as
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 spending time with their parents,
kids
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kids'
kid's
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 evolution depends
from
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on
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 various factors.
Submitted by marjorie2908 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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