In some countries, the number of shootings increase because many people have guns at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give specific reasons and examples to support your answer. Acros

Crime is increasing day by day in many countries and shooting
people
is one of them. Some folks believe that having weapons at home is the main cause of
this
. I disagree with
this
statement
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because a lot of
people
keep guns for self-defence only.
To begin
with, there are a number of reasons why
people
shoot others.
Firstly
, nobody shoots without a motive.Holding a gun does not encourage shooting, there are always hidden reasons, which lead
people
to hit others.
For example
, there was a new showed on IVT television channel that a 19-year-old man shot a senior citizen lived next door and neighbours were arguing that the boy
shoot
Wrong verb form
shot
show examples
because he was drunk and had a gun at home,
however
after an
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
investigation it was found that they both have some personal issues.
Furthermore
, with the extensive growth of robberies and break-ins, majority of the
people
get weapon licences for self-defence and when they come across any criminal activities they
used
Wrong verb form
use
show examples
these to protect themselves or their families, which sometimes
counted
Wrong verb form
counts
show examples
as killing.
Additionally
, when someone wants to kill anybody, they do not need a weapon as there are many other ways to do it.
However
, there should be some restrictions before issuing a licence, a proper background check must be required.
Moreover
, weapon sellers should
also
need to be more careful before selling.
To sum up
, with the rapid emergence of crime,
people
feel unsafe and buy guns for their protection and not to hurt others. But strict parameters must be set before allowing anyone to keep a gun at home.
Submitted by vinder323 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Improve task response by directly addressing the prompt and presenting a clear stance.
coherence cohesion
Enhance coherence and cohesion by organizing the essay into clear paragraphs and providing better overall structure.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: