The number of people suffering from health problems caused by a modern lifestyle which cannot be treated with modern medicines. Some people believe that alternative medicine can help. Do you agree that alternative medicines are effective?

#people #health #lifestyle #medicines #alternative #medicine

this

modern era, the development of

technologies

Fix the agreement mistake

technology

show examples

has made people’s lives far easier. But it has disadvantages, like a sedentary lifestyle, less or no exercise, low immunity, etc. Some people believe that alternative medicine is a suitable treatment for the physical issues caused by the current way of life. I strongly disagree with the opinion that unconventional

medicines

are the best choice. Let's discuss more about the topic in the upcoming paragraphs.

Firstly

, alternative

medicines

like yoga, naturopathy, and ayurveda are helpful for rejuvenating weak bodies and mental health.

However

, these folk

medicines

provide quick relief for specific symptoms when targeted, which is proven with chemical formulas and herbs. To cite an example, practising yoga will be advantageous for

relaxation

Correct article usage

the relaxation

show examples

of muscles and mental

wellbeing

Correct your spelling

well-being

show examples

, just like hitting the gym.

Likewise

, most of the holistic medicine practitioners who insist on following these methods lack appropriate medical backgrounds and are driven by cultural or religious beliefs.

Secondly

, the development of modern

medicines

has changed societies and improved the human life span. Modern-day

medicines

have done much in the field of infectious diseases and emergency aids to cure them. In the meantime, new-age doctors are tirelessly working to resolve the health problems that affect people in their day-to-day lives. Significantly, in the area of emergency trauma care, cancer treatments, heart diseases, etc., unlike unconventional medicine, which failed to resolve these issues, In conclusion, modern-day

medicines

are the best solution for modern-day problems other than alternative

medicines

since they have been scientifically proven with real results and not just from theories. Even so, some people believe that unconventional

medicines

provide a bigger benefit than accurately proven medical methods.

Submitted by anusree.pillai.1992 on Mon Jul 10 2023

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
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Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

276 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.5

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The number of people suffering from health problems caused by a modern lifestyle which cannot be treated with modern medicines. Some people believe that alternative medicine can help. Do you agree that alternative medicines are effective?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people say that now we can see films on our phones or tablets there is no need to go to the cinema. Others say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema. Discuss both these views and give Your Opinion.

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Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic. What are the advantage and disadvantage of tourist who visits such places?

In many countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of crime? How can we deal with those causes?