Some people think that music plays an important role in society other think it is simply a form of entertainment. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Nowadays, people think that an important role in society is

music

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but others think

music

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is only considered a form of entertainment. In

this

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essay, I will write down my opinion and I will give the points of both views. I will totally agree with the idea that

music

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is an important thing for society.

Firstly

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, it helps dispel suffering, brings joy, youthfulness and

full

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is full

show examples

of life.

Besides

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, there is soft

music

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for everyone to listen to when working or there is funny

music

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that people can turn on to listen to when having fun.

Secondly

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music

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can

also

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have a great impact on human development.

For example

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, pregnant women often let unborn babies listen to

music

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right from the time they are in the womb, which will help them to form and develop better thinking.

On the other hand

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, there are some ideas to express the second point of view in

this

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essay. Currently,

music

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activities are often held in the summer so that pupils

as well as

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students can participate in long vacations.

For example

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, RapViet and The Voice are two programs held regularly for people to have the opportunity to show their talent and passion for

music

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Moreover

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, thanks to those entertainment

music

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programs, we have more young singers so that they can achieve their dreams and compose more good works. In conclusion,

music

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is an important part of our lives, it can help us relieve stress and help us achieve our passion for singing.

phuongank1511Tue Jul 11 2023

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

248 words

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Some people think that music plays an important role in society other think it is simply a form of entertainment. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

The major cities in the world are growing fast, as well as their problems. What are the problems that young peopl living in cities are facing with? Give solutions to these problems

An increasing number of schools provide tablets and laptop computers for students to use in school, replacing books and other printed materials like exams and assignments. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

Nowadays many young people spend their free time in shopping centers. This has a negative effect on youths and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poor countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?

Some people claim that museums and art galleries will not be need because people can see historical objects and works of arts by computers. Do you agree or disagree