IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Social media addiction: Many people believe that social networking sites such as Facebook have a negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In the era of globalization and modern
technologies
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,technologies
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people
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 and children are becoming addicted to social networks. Many individuals believe that social
medias
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media
show examples
such
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 as Facebook have
adverse
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an adverse
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effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
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 on
people
Use synonyms
's lives, and I partially agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement. The objective of
this
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 essay is to examine
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
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 and drawbacks of the Internet in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society. On the one
hand
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,hand
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 social networks
has
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have
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 changed
human's
Change noun form
human
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 lives
to
Change preposition
for
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 the better and
convenient
Correct quantifier usage
more convenient
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 side.
In other words
Linking Words
 with the help of the
Internet
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,Internet
show examples
 citizens can easily get access to everything. As an example of
this
Linking Words
,
people
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 can contact their relatives and friends with whom they have lost connection, nowadays technology has improved so much that we can find anyone on the web only knowing their name and surname. In consequence, inhabitants find their old acquaintances anew and do not cut off contact with
people
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 they cannot meet in life.
On the other
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hand
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,hand
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people
Use synonyms
 have become
inclinned
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inclined
 to live in social
medias
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media
show examples
. In other quarters,
majority
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the majority
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 of social media users almost do not live in their real life, they do not meet up with their friends and family.
For instance
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, for fascinated
users
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,users
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 it is more important to search the net and easier to text a message rather than going outside.
Therefore
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,
people
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 become
clained
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chained
claimed
 to their
bed
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beds
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 and
having
Wrong verb form
have
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 an abnormal number of
diseas
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disease
diseases
 caused by gadgets.
To sum up
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, all
aforementioned
Correct article usage
the aforementioned
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 points social networks provide
people
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 with big problems with health and communication with society in real life. As far as I am concerned, if
people
Use synonyms
 had not been that addicted to their phones, the problem would be easily solved.

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