It is common for people to travel long distances for work and study. Some argue that longer commute times affect people in a negative way while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #travel #distances #work #study #argue #times

last

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

recent decades, based on laxity in job opportunities, living in metropolitan cities, and so on, people have to spend a lot of time and energy on the way. So, there are two different kinds of view as

Correct subject-verb agreement

follows

show examples

; the one is that shipment times can have detrimental effects on human beings, and the second is that longer commute times do not have drawbacks.

Although

there are so many benefits in working and travelling long distances to your workplace or studying institutes, I side with the first opinion.

Firstly

, transportation imposes a great deal of money on the national budget, and every day millions of people use public transport so governments have to disburse money and it is not financially justifiable.

However

, by accumulating money, authorities can provide job opportunities or progress to elite universities. Having provided career opportunities, governments can disburse eco-friendly vehicles, and

subsequently

, they prevent air pollution which appears by transportation.

Secondly

, physical pain paves the way for mental disorders so, by travelling far distances, people are about to be frustrated.

Consequently

, frustration can

make

Verb problem

cause

show examples

a lot of family conflicts, and it can affect their life a group of problems will

be appeared

Wrong verb form

appear

show examples

in the family

such

as family breakdowns and children's upbringing issues.

Finally

, it is said

Change preposition

that

show examples

immigration to the cities has increased in

last

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

recent decades, and it is

due to

better accommodations and facilities which are currently provided in megacities so it has a detrimental effect on our rural life.

For example

, our industries which rely on rural districts will be damaged and a great part of our domestic product will be decreased.

Accordingly

, GDP will decrease, and it hinder sustainable country progressions. In conclusion,

although

there are so many benefits to working and studying in prestigious associations, it has lots of drawbacks to consider

such

as wasting the national budget, mental disorders, and destroying rural lives and industries.

Submitted by amirmasoumi93 on Wed Jul 12 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response

Ensure to link your ideas more explicitly to the topic and clearly state your opinion in the introduction.

Coherence and Cohesion

Work on providing a stronger thesis statement in the introduction and summarizing your main points in the conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

317 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4
band
Nowadays, some employers think that formal academic qualifications are more important than life experience or personal qualities when they look for new employees. Why is it the case? To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In recent years,some argue that a formal academic qualification owns the higher state when they recruit a new staff.In my opinion,I completely disagree with this point of view and I believe that life experience and personal qualities are more important which can be supported by the reasons as follows.
5
band
Students should focus on learning in the classroom rather than show their status by wearing fashionable clothes. Thebefore, all students have to wear school uniforms. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
It is true that pupils should emphasize learning in the classroom rather than show state by dressing in trendy garments. All pupils should wear school uniforms. I completely agree with the idea that students should concentrate on learning for education rather than simply wearing fashionable clothes.
4
band
Shopping should be perceived as a form of self-indulgence rather than about buying things that are necessary. Do you agree or disagree?
With growth of people’s well-being much standards we had in the past are broke down, replaced with something unusual. The statement “In some countries today, people are having their first child when they are older” proofs enough this tendency. Let’s reveal advantages and disadvantages of this decision.
6.5
band
Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In the contemporary era, many minors put the mjority of their time on their handsets. In my opinion, owing to existing entertainment applications that are amusing on mobile phones, this trend occurs. In addition, I hold this view that it is a negative trend that can cause serious problems in juveniles' lives.
5
band
Some people believe that unpaid community service should be compulsory in high school programmes (for example, working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). Do you agree or disagree?
There is a debate regarding whether unpaid community service programmes should be mandated for teenagers at schools. I agree to this argument as it would help develop their interpersonal skills and gain life expereinces that are crucial for their adulthoods.

It is common for people to travel long distances for work and study. Some argue that longer commute times affect people in a negative way while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Nowadays, some employers think that formal academic qualifications are more important than life experience or personal qualities when they look for new employees. Why is it the case? To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Students should focus on learning in the classroom rather than show their status by wearing fashionable clothes. Thebefore, all students have to wear school uniforms. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Shopping should be perceived as a form of self-indulgence rather than about buying things that are necessary. Do you agree or disagree?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be compulsory in high school programmes (for example, working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). Do you agree or disagree?