These days young children spend a lot of time using computers, tablet and smartphones. Some people think that introducing children to technology at a young age is beneficial. Others believe that they would benefit more from traditional games. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge and experience.

#children #time #computers #tablet #smartphones #people #technology #age #games

it would indeed be a hard task to isolate a country which is unaffected by the phenomenon of

technology

People

would not find it shocking, if

this

trend were to heighten in the coming years,Considering the current trajectory of the modern world . Increasingly laid out for all to see and fast becoming a fixture of many discussions is an issue that pertains to the

technology

benefits

as well as

traditional

games

This

essay shall analyse the issue from all angles and argue that

technology

effects

Correct your spelling

affects

show examples

children .

Firstly

, we are using more devices in our day-to-day life because

technology

has

been

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

drastically increased in

this

era. We have more educational platforms on websites if children use

technology

in an appropriate way

consequently

they might gain more knowledge and they become smarter.Take Britain

for example

, where a poll

was

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

published on BBC's website stated that the overwhelming majority of present-day researchers had decided to give more awareness to youngsters

Change preposition

through

show examples

the usage of

technology

On the other hand

,playing traditional

games

also

has more advantages it makes

people

more engaged with others

while

they are playing traditional

games

and

moreover

friendly

people

can make a strong society.In Germany in 2007 over a two-year period, Which polled over ninety thousand

people

, Showed that opinions varied considerably.A vast majority supported the above-mentioned viewpoint and

itconsidered

Correct your spelling

considered

it considered

. it as paramount. In conclusion,

technology

and traditional

games

both have pros and cons in my perspective pupils should use electronic devices in

a limited ways

Correct the article-noun agreement

a limited way

limited ways

show examples

Submitted by ksr.sandya on Thu Jul 13 2023

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Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

248 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Word Count

Some people believe that a person's culture is defined by their country of origin, while others believe that has only a minor influence. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Some people think that in order to deal with the problem of congestion in cities, privately owned vehicles should be banned in city centers, while others consider this to be an unrealistic solution. discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Going shopping used to be a chore, but recently it has become a leisure activity or a pleasant outing. To my mind, it is debatable whether this can be regarded as a wholly positive development