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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think that the role of parents is to discipline their children and teach them about right and wrong. Other people consider the main responsibility of parents to be to nurture their children and provide them with a safe environment to grow up in. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #role #parents #discipline #children #right #responsibility #environment
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Nowadays, the dispute between child-rearing approaches is singled out as a concern preoccupying the populace. It is irrefutable that parental involvement is indispensable for a child's either mental or physical well-being,
however
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, I oppose the conservative viewpoint which encourages parental over-manipulation. Certainly, lenient
parents
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 are attributed to the outlook that juvenile delinquency runs rampant when family mindsets are the cornerstones of a child's cognitive development. Had it not been for the idea that
parents
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 are to be held accountable for rectifying their
children
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's improper deeds, and applying appropriate measures to adjust them, their offspring would have been left with a legacy of moral decay, which is conducive to social decadence.
For instance
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,
children
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 who are born in slums, where are vulnerable to insufficient parental care and education as well, have a higher chance to commit crime than their other counterparts.
However
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, not only does parental interference may intrude on
children
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's all-around development but traditional reasonings belonging to them
also
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 become obsolete by ceaseless technological advancement. It is learning autonomy and secure surroundings that
parents
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 are required to prioritize when they bring up a child. As smartphones are fully equipped with search engines,
children
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 can access a pool of information in the palm of their hand. By that,
parents
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 should merely take steps to define whether their content is healthy or not. There are compelling rationales behind
parents
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' fixating to keep
children
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 under control, but spoon-feeding and overdirecting will shackle
children
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 from their freedom of choice. Given that parental consent is of paramount importance, parental involvement should not serve as a psychological buffer that hampers
children
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 from standing on their own feet. In conclusion,
parents
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 have a pivotal role in averting
children
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 the domain prospect of criminal activities,
however
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, they should leave more space for
children
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's personal development. As child-rearing is instrumental to
children
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's later life, especially in formative years, we need to be more meticulous about their method.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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