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Band 7.5

Full time university students spend most of the time studying. They should be doing other activities too. To what extent do you agree or disagree?’

#time #university #students #activities
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The more you study, the more you will be intelligent.
Thus
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, the majority of university students prefer studying their whole
time
Use synonyms
, and they ought to do other physical activities to keep fit
as well as
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 be healthy. I totally agree with the aforementioned notion, and the following paragraphs will expatiate both stances with lucid examples.
Firstly
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, in a competitive society, in which technological development is evolving at light speed, many pupils tend to acquire the valuable knowledge that they need to contribute to their countries. It means that education is being more and more important than in the past.
For example
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, Isreal people, many of them are scientists or intelligent, lead to the clever index which criticizes the world's population. It is because they lay more emphasis on their education compared to other people, and most of the
time
Use synonyms
 they exercise in order to be healthy.
In addition
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, If countries didn't consider education carefully, universities,
as well as
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 schools would non-exist in our life.
Secondly
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, If we spend most
time
Use synonyms
 only studying, our health and communication skills will decrease.
Although
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 many scientists said that they preferred to stay alone, in reality, being alone is influenced by their brain's neuro system which is an important part of communicating with someone.
Therefore
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, the majority of the university has a number of international students to avoid being alone and increase their relationships between males and females.
As a result
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, many educational institutions and universities did more physical movements than the previous
time
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, if we can balance study and activities, we will understand difference between the reality and life.
Submitted by Zolboo on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • holistic development
  • extracurricular activities
  • soft skills
  • mental health
  • well-being
  • stress and burnout
  • networking opportunities
  • career opportunities
  • time management
  • prioritize
  • juggle multiple responsibilities
  • practical experience
  • theoretical knowledge
  • community engagement
  • social awareness
  • volunteer work
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