Many people think that every individual is responsible for their happiness, but some people believe that there are other external factors that influence us. Discuss both views and give your own oppinion

Opinions are divided on whether happiness should be created as personal responsibility or whether external factors could influence us. In
this
essay, I will discuss both sides of the argument and explain my support for the latter view. With regards to some
people
have the perception that happiness depends on a
person
's state of mind and heart, and every individual must have the ability to take control of their feelings.
For instance
,
while
a group of
people
is in the same situation, each of them has a different attitude.
Furthermore
, there are several ways to help maintain inner peace of mental health
such
as yoga or self-help books.
Therefore
,
this
provides another positive way to look at their
life
and through practices like yoga, it can be achieved. As far as many factors that can change a
person
's mood.
Firstly
, when
people
meet their fundamental requirements and have the same entertainment and relaxation, they can claim their pleasure.
Secondly
,
people
with good quality of
life
have more satisfaction than other ordinary citizens.
Additionally
, health can direct influence on
person
's happy
life
.
This
is not a surprise that a healthier
person
enjoys a lucrative lifestyle and has more activities that could be a source of joy for him.
Besides
, healthy relations relevant make
people
happier.
For example
, love can make a
person
happier than ever. In conclusion, we as individuals are responsible for our own happiness,
however
, it is undeniable that external influences will partly affect the choices we make in
life
.
Submitted by hangry.ng11 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!