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Band 5

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of chargin people for admissions to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

#museums #charge #admission #people #admissions
Nowadays, some
museums
 charge
visitors
with
Change preposition
apply
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entry
fees
,
while
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others are free of charge and
people
 can visit them without paying
admissions
Fix the agreement mistake
admission
show examples
.
Although
 charging
visitors
 might bring about drawbacks, I believe that the merits outweigh the disadvantageous in many ways. Some
people
 assume that imposing entry
fees
 have negative consequences.
Firstly
,
as a result
 of
this
 phenomenon some poor
people
 or students with low incomes will be deprived of visiting these places,
thus
 they lose the opportunity to learn new information about their culture and history.
Moreover
,
this
 trend can discourage
people
, especially teenagers, in order to visit
museums
. In
this
 contemporary era, there are various free activities available to children
such
 as video games or online film streaming, and they might prefer these activities to
museums
,
hence
 they can not be in touch with culture and history which is demonstrated in
museums
. In spite of mentioned demerits, I opine that levying
fees
to
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on
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visitors
 can bring about numerous
of
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apply
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advantageous
Replace the word
advantages
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. Primarily, the collected money can meet the expenditures of
museums
. There is an array of precious and valuable
objects
 and sites in the
museums
 that should be protected from not only thefts but
also
 damages that might be caused by ignorant
visitors
. These
fees
 can be applied to hire more security guards to protect
these cultural and historical heritage
Change the determiner
this cultural and historical heritage
show examples
.
Furthermore
, these charged
admissions
 can meet the costs of refurbishing
the
Correct article usage
apply
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old and damaged
objects
. Some of the ancient
objects
 face
damages
Fix the agreement mistake
damage
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 or lose their attractive
colors
Change the spelling
colours
show examples
 and designs after thousands of years and need to be renewed which has astronomical costs and the required money can be provided through imposed
admissions
,
hence
 more
people
 will be encouraged to visit the
museums
 demonstrating a range of various attractive
objects
. In conclusion, despite
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 disadvantageous, imposing
admissions
 to museum
visitors
 can lead to beneficial impacts for maintaining these places in terms of both safety and attractiveness.
Submitted by mohammadmgh1381 on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural heritage
  • Preservation
  • Exclusionary
  • Revenue
  • Artifact
  • Maintenance
  • Engagement
  • Admission fee
  • Cultural enrichment
  • Sustainable funding
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