Children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social and commercial perspectives. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?

#children #pressures #perspectives #measures

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Children

Use synonyms

experience many pressures in terms of study, society, and commercials. These several causes of

this

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problem and some solutions to solve the above situation.

To begin

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with, there are some reasons why

children

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are under so much stress nowadays. The first one is that they have to compete with many other admissions to get into school. In an era where learning comes

first,

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the stress of study is inevitable

due to

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the high level of competition. They have to study hard to submit to a better school, which is an extremely stressful environment.

In addition

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, being aware of the change in

this

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era, educational institutions have added more subjects to equip their students with better preparation.

However

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, it creates more pressure for admission because a lot of knowledge and exercises need to be absorbed before doing other things.

As a result

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children

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will have less free time between academy sessions and they not be able to do the things they enjoy

Nevertheless

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although

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there are some problems above, there are several solutions to solve the tense situation of

children

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in the present.

Firstly

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, we should launch any campaign programs in the media or the department to re-educate the awareness of parents and students. In these programs,

children

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are taught that they should work together to improve their knowledge

instead

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of competing for a place in a good department.

Secondly

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, educators had better review their education plans. They should reduce the number of theoretical lessons in class and focus on practical lessons, which bring many social skills, or reduce the amount of homework so that heir can participate in more outdoor activities.

For instance

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according to

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a survey in Europe, tension among

children

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has decreased by 25% after the same solutions were done.

To conclude

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, there are some reasons why

children

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are facing more pressure nowadays and some action to solve

this

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situation.

Sun Jul 23 2023

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task response

The essay partially addresses the causes and measures to reduce children's pressures. However, the explanations lack depth and specificity. It would be beneficial to provide more detailed and relevant examples to support the points made.

coherence cohesion

The essay demonstrates a logical structure with clear introduction and conclusion. However, the connection between ideas within and between paragraphs could be improved. Utilize cohesive devices such as linking words and transition phrases to enhance coherence.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

313 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

academic pressure
globalized world
competitive education system
social media influences
cyberbullying
commercial pressures
aggressive marketing
materialistic desires
peer pressure
high expectations
standardized testing
quantifiable performance
stress and anxiety
extracurricular achievements

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Children are facing more pressures nowadays from academic, social and commercial perspectives. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

High school students are usually not good at managing money. What are the reasons? What are the solutions?

Some people believe that professional workers such as doctors and teachers should be paid more than sports and entertainment personalities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some believe travel is overrated. People argue whether travel is or is not a component of a quality education. To what extent do you agree with it?

Directors and managers of organisations are often older people. Some people say that it is better for younger people to be leaders. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

‘It is important for foreigners to know something about the history and culture of the country they live in.’ To what extent do you agree or disagree?