some people believe that allowing chidren to make their own choices on everyday matters is likely to result in society of individuals who only think about their own wishes, other believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them. discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many people argue that differences occur with children handle their situations for their own wishes or the instruction of their parents. I believe that making their own decisions is crucial for raising well-educated offspring.
This
essay will explain both ideas and give my opinion. Being a self-centred person wouldn't be derived from only allowing heir to make their own choices.
Besides
, there are influenced by a lot of things
such
as
:
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
family problems, upbringing environment, copying elders, and harmful things that are involved in their mental health so on.
Additionally
, parents have to take care of confronted problems of their kids and discuss with moral common rules. In a recent study by the psychology department at Oxford University, 15% of total participated children who want to choose everyday matters without their parent's permission tend to be evaluated self-centred in their class. Popular and highly successful people have their own brains to reach their plans. If there are some bad results that happen after teenagers make decisions about matters that affect them, they have to tackle these obstacles themselves which makes them adults. Talented singer
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and songwriter Taylor Swift said that she was a very independent girl in the Billboard Awards. Her story beginner with buying a guitar and writing song lyrics
instead
of pursuing university like others . Both views put forward valid points,
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
I strongly believe that we have to make decisions evaluating the benefits outweigh the drawbacks of something. In conclusion, we have to admit that there are a lot of published study results and research that discussed the benefits of being self-organized, independent offspring.
Submitted by baigalnarantuya1 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: