Cities are becoming overcrowded. What are the causes of this situation, and what can be done to improve this situation?

Urbanisation is extremely popular nowadays. The population of metropolitical areas is denser.

This

essay will elaborate on reasons

as well as

solutions in the upcoming paragraphs. The foremost effect of crowding is an imbalance in the environment. Pollution will be raised because urban cities are usually less environmentally friendly. Numerous workplaces and traffic are caused the nature

deeply

Rephrase

apply

show examples

. More

people

will use more facilities.

For instance

, as per a recent survey, 60 % of the rural population moved to cities for a better future over a decade.

In addition

, competition is

also

hiked. Thousands of young

people

get unbeatable grades every year.

But the

Correct word choice

The

show examples

limited source of work

Verb problem

has

show examples

influenced many houses.

Therefore

people

will suffer a lot in their residences.

On the other hand

this

problem can be solved by expanding the area of urban. Citizens can get a chance to live

as well as

enjoy the facilities of urban areas.

Similarly

, the government of the country should

also

provide a good commutation system from city to rural state.

Thus

people

will avoid moving and prefer to travel.

For example

, good roads and available transportation will overcome

this

situation.

Hence

, if the suburban population can easily get the amenities

then

shifting the whole family will definitely be avoided. To summarise, no doubt, urban places are way better than suburban but overcrowding will make it

worst

Correct word choice

worse

show examples

day by day. Adapting some sort of solution will surely change the situation

that is

rising now.

Submitted by harpreet291kaur on Mon Jul 24 2023

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Coherence and Cohesion

The essay lacks clear organization and logical structure. The introduction and conclusion need improvement. The main points are not adequately supported.

Task Achievement

The response addresses the task to some extent, but the ideas are not fully developed. The examples provided are not relevant enough. There is a need for clearer and more comprehensive ideas.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

243 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Cities are becoming overcrowded. What are the causes of this situation, and what can be done to improve this situation?

Word Count

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