Task 2: Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

In today's era,
children
tend to become more attracted towards
smartphones
.
Due to
this
, they spend most of their
time
on these devices. I strongly believe it has negative developments on the minds of the
children
, it could lead to more grumpy behaviour and it will
also
detach them from the real world as well.
Smartphones
were invented to be feasible for humankind, but most parents tend to forget that smartphone contains highly saturated information which only an adult can comprehend and control.
Moreover
, before the invention of these phones
children
back
then
used to entertain themselves by watching TV programs or playing video games and even playing real outdoor games as well, but as
time
has evolved
children
now indulge more in
smartphones
where they talk and chat
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
their online friends and play online games most of the
time
.
This
has created a problem of detachment from making friends in real-life and getting attached to virtual life where they can easily get manipulated by anyone which could be dicey for them.
In addition
, spending hours on
smartphones
have led to unknown health issues in young life it could be eyesight issue or
due to
lack of activity, they are getting obese. It
also
creates an issue of behaviour among young kids where they get angry with their parents when they don't get them their desired things because they want to show off in front of their virtual friends.
For instance
,
Most
Fix capitalization
most
show examples
children
flaunt their dresses or even
smartphones
when their parents buy them and no matter how much expensive it would be they easily get disappointed
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
when someone purchases something even more expensive.
This
has led to a materialistic mindset among
children
and forget to appreciate the things
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
they have.
To conclude
,
Smartphones
are addictive towards
children
and they spend most of their
time
on
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
, it will surely lead to unknown problems if they are not rectified. It will always outweigh the negative development more than the positive in the
children
.
Submitted by Melroy  on

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
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