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Band 4

Life was better when technology was simpler. To what extent do you agree and disagree?

#life #technology
It is a point of debate that the more basic
technology
 was, the more elevated our living standards were. Undoubtedly,
this
 notion remains
sucessful
Correct your spelling
successful
 in keeping
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
against
Correct pronoun usage
itagainst
show examples
. The upcoming paragraphs will shed light on my arguments related to
labour
 savings and learning chances given by advanced
equipments
Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
,
then
 will lead to a logical conclusion. The first and foremost evidence for
positive
Correct article usage
the positive
show examples
 influences of
technology
 on life is that technological outbreaks have revolutionised the way how residents work. In simple words, machines and
automative
Correct your spelling
automotive
show examples
 have now performed operations that used to take a wide variety of our efforts,
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
 and resources.
Moreover
, manufacturable factories have had substitutes for human
labour
 by modern machines.
Beside
Replace the word
Besides
show examples
, most of
traditional
Add an article
the traditional
show examples
 communication tools have been replaced by advanced offices,
email
Correct word choice
and email
show examples
. These changes have created considerable
labour
 savings and improved productivity extremely.
Secondly
, it is obvious that
technology
 not only improves work productivity and efficiency but it
also
 provides us with a range of useful knowledge.
In addition
, if we have a stock of available information, we can learn and work more effectively.
For instance
, students can search and study anything on social networking sites
such
 as Youtube,
therefore
 getting degrees online can become
reality
Correct article usage
a reality
show examples
.
This
 is evidence
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 how
technology
 creates conditions for
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
 and makes knowledge more accessible. In conclusion, our lives have been improved remarkably by technological development, especially
labour
 savings and learning opportunities provided by modern
equipments
Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
.
Submitted by domaianh.uliser on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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