The diagrams below show the site of a school in 20104 and the plan for changes to the school site in 2024

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The maps compare the layout of a

school

Use synonyms

as it was in the year 2004 with a proposed site design for the year 2024.

Overall

Linking Words

, the main change for 2024 involves the appearance of a new

school

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building. The

school

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will

then

Linking Words

be able to accommodate a considerably large number of students. In 2004, there were 600 pupils attending the

school

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, and the two buildings were separated by a path running from the main entrance to the sports field. By 2014, it is expected that there will be 1000 pupils

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apply

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and a third building will have been constructed on the original site of the sports field.

In addition

Linking Words

, the path will have been shortened in order to connect it to the two original buildings, which will have been linked. A second

car

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park

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will be built next to the third building, and the sports field with a smaller area will be relocated to the south of the

car

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park

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in 2024. A new road

also

Linking Words

will be built from the main entrance to the second

car

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park

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Finally

Linking Words

, there will be no changes to the original

car

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park

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and the main entrance.

nttung.182Fri Jul 28 2023

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words school, car, park with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

192 words

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The diagrams below show the site of a school in 20104 and the plan for changes to the school site in 2024

Some people believe that police force carries guns, this encourage higher level of violence in that society. To what extend do yo agree or disagree?

Some people think that the goverment should strictly control the supply of fresh water, as it is a limited resource , while others it should not be regulated. Discuss both the sides and give your opinion