It is a good idea for people to continue working beyond retirement age. Do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, many elderly people are working after
retirement
. It has been suggested that working beyond Use synonyms
this
age is good for them. In my opinion, they should not work after Linking Words
retirement
.
It is my view that being retired, older folk have the chance to relax and do their favourite activities which they did not have the time to do as an employee. Use synonyms
For instance
, they can read more books and spend most of their time with their relatives. Thanks to Linking Words
retirement
, they have more hours to enjoy their friends. Use synonyms
In addition
, working retirees bring about a lack of job opportunities for younger who need jobs and money Linking Words
for providing
their families with their basic needs. Change preposition
to provide
For example
, in societies that suffer from economic problems, most retired citizens are unable to access necessities for life. Linking Words
Consequently
, they are forced to work. Since job opportunities are limited, the young public is deprived of having a career.
Linking Words
In contrast
, some nations claim that retired persons are more likely to suffer from depression. They firmly insist that retired populations who stay at home and do not have a career face depression. Linking Words
For instance
, I, personally, know a few relatives who after Linking Words
retirement
became depressed and spent most of their hours in a room and do not communicate with others. Use synonyms
However
, I do not find Linking Words
this
argument convincing as they can join clubs and link with peers in regular activities.
In conclusion, I completely disagree with doing work for the retired population because they should relax and do their favourite activities. Linking Words
Also
, youngsters are able to reach more job opportunities.Linking Words
Submitted by smksalati on
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task response
In your essay, you need to fully address the prompt. Make sure your arguments and examples are directly related to the idea of working beyond retirement age.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure, but make sure to use linking words and transitional phrases to improve the flow of ideas. Also, try to group similar ideas together for better coherence.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary to express your ideas in more varied and precise ways. Avoid repetition and use synonyms to enhance your lexical resource.
grammatical range
Work on using a wider range of grammatical structures in your sentences. Vary your sentence structure by using different kinds of clauses and phrases.