In many countries, women no longer feel the need to get married. Some people believe that this is because women are able to earn their own income and therefore do not require the financial security that marriage can bring. To what extent do you agree?

#countries #women #people #income #security #marriage

Nowadays females

Verb problem

are

show examples

not

require

Wrong verb form

required

show examples

to marry and prefer to remain unmarried, so

according to

some, since

women

become financially independent, the tendency to get married for financial support has decreased. Despite

this

, I do not agree that the rate of

marriage

has fallen

due to

women

's financial security. A good reason for a decreased rate of

marriage

is that young adults can not find their true soulmates.

In other words

marriage

is a beautiful relationship between two souls and

thus

sharing their emotions or feeling with each other plays a more important role than the financial aspects of life. Since it has become so challenging these days to find a person who has mutual interests with them, the female young generations prefer to stay single. Taking Iran as an example, for religious families, it is

Rephrase

apply

show examples

vital to find a husband for their daughters who follow the same traditions more than monetary reasons. Another point to consider is that the decreased prevalence of

marriage

would be a result of higher education among

women

. At present, because of liberalization , a majority of

women

continue their

further

education and get higher positions in society.

Although

they earn brilliant incomes

due to

their university education, finding a soulmate who has the same degree as them is essential for them. If a man is not well-educated and does not have the same social status as a woman, they

would

Wrong verb form

will

show examples

not lead a long-lasting relationship.

For example

, numerous educated girls in Iran prefer to marry a man with a

PHD

Correct your spelling

Ph.D.

degree

although

he is poor. In conclusion, the need

of getting

Change preposition

to get

show examples

married among females has plummeted and their tendency to remain single has soared

due to

the lack of mutual interests and educational levels between them , which are more vital than the financial independence of

women

Submitted by parismasoumzadeh7495 on Sat Jul 29 2023

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task response

Ensure that the essay directly answers the question by discussing the reasons for the decreased rate of marriage and specifically addressing the role of women's financial independence.

coherence cohesion

The essay demonstrates a logical structure with clear introduction and conclusion. However, consider linking ideas within paragraphs more effectively to enhance coherence.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

305 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In many countries, women no longer feel the need to get married. Some people believe that this is because women are able to earn their own income and therefore do not require the financial security that marriage can bring. To what extent do you agree?

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

In many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many government think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required?

In recent years, “responsible tourists” have paid attention to preserving both culture and environment of the places they visit. However, some people say that it is impossible to be a “responsible tourist”. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+