IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that a huge amount of time and money is spent on protection of wild animals, and that this money could be better spent on the human population. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.

#people #amount #time #money #protection #animals #population
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some individuals believe that a considerable amount of time and
money
Use synonyms
 is spent on
conservation
Correct article usage
the conservation
show examples
 of wild
animals
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and that
this
Linking Words
money
Use synonyms
 could be best spent on the human inhabitants. I totally disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement because
preservation
Correct article usage
the preservation
show examples
 of
animals
Use synonyms
 will enhance medical research,
Use synonyms
tourism
Correct article usage
the tourism
show examples
industry
Use synonyms
, and
ehthicals
Correct your spelling
ethical
 values .
To begin
Linking Words
 with , there are several reasons why I believe
spent
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
money
Use synonyms
 on
protection
Add an article
the protection
show examples
 of wild
animals
Use synonyms
 is justified. The primary reason protection of
animals
Use synonyms
 boosts medical
researches
Fix the agreement mistake
research
show examples
. To illustrate, scientists can do their
researches
Fix the agreement mistake
research
show examples
 on wild
animals
Use synonyms
 in order to find
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
new drugs for many diseases namely, cancer, heart attack, and brain stroke.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
preservation
Correct article usage
the preservation
show examples
 of
animals
Use synonyms
 can improve the health of
people
Use synonyms
.
Enhance
Wrong verb form
Enhancing
show examples
Use synonyms
tourism
Correct article usage
the tourism
show examples
industry
Use synonyms
 is another reason why I believe
conservation
Correct article usage
the conservation
show examples
 of wild
animals
Use synonyms
 is extremely crucial.
This
Linking Words
 is because many tourists worldwide will visit zoos in order to
sea
Correct your spelling
see
show examples
 wild
animals
Use synonyms
.
Consequently
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
tourism
Add an article
the tourism
show examples
industry
Use synonyms
 will create many
jobs opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
job opportunities
show examples
 and income for local
people
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
,
thousands
Add the preposition
thousands of
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 will work
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 zoos, guided tours,
hotels
Correct word choice
and hotels
show examples
, which
mean
Correct subject-verb agreement
means
show examples
 these jobs help to
boosts
Change the verb
boost
show examples
Use synonyms
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
 and reduce the rate of poverty.
Finally
Linking Words
, wild
animals
Use synonyms
 high
Correct article usage
the rights
show examples
rights
Fix the agreement mistake
right
show examples
 to live as humans and should
be respect
Change the verb form
be respected
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
 is because scientists
proven
Add the auxiliary verb
proved
have proven
show examples
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
animals
Use synonyms
 feel
as
Change preposition
like
show examples
 humans they get mental health issues like
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 depression, anxiety, and stress.
As a result
Linking Words
, we should spend
money
Use synonyms
 in order to improve the wild
animals
Use synonyms
.
To sum up
Linking Words
, I completely believe
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
spent
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
money
Use synonyms
 on
protection
Add an article
the protection
show examples
 of wild
animals
Use synonyms
 is
merit
Correct article usage
a merit
show examples
 because
preservation
Correct article usage
the preservation
show examples
 of
animals
Use synonyms
 will
boosts
Change the verb form
boost
show examples
medical research,
Use synonyms
tourism
Correct article usage
the tourism
show examples
industry
Use synonyms
, and moral values.
Submitted by faiz3177 on

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task response
Ensure that your essay directly addresses the prompt. Make sure to provide a clear stance and support it with relevant examples and ideas.
coherence cohesion
Use transition words and phrases to connect ideas. Develop a clearer introduction and conclusion to provide a strong framework for your essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • ecosystem stability
  • pollination
  • water purification
  • climate regulation
  • eco-tourism
  • scientific research
  • moral and ethical responsibility
  • deforestation
  • pollution
  • financial cost
  • social issues
  • healthcare
  • education
  • fund allocation
What to do next:
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