IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one are of Britian. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distribiuted.

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one are of Britian. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distribiuted.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The two pie charts and table illustrate the data on the whole
budget
Use synonyms
 of the police department and the distribution of expenditure in a certain area of Britain in 2017 and 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
, the biggest part of the police
budget
Use synonyms
 and the majority part of the different categories on which money was spent did not change, still being the national governments and salaries respectively.
Moreover
Linking Words
, these two data show a slight increase respectively. As can be seen, the contribution of the national government accounted for more than half of the total
budget
Use synonyms
, which stood at 175.5
million
Use synonyms
 in 2017 and 177.8
million
Use synonyms
 in 2018. It was followed by 91.2
million
Use synonyms
 in local taxes and 38.5
million
Use synonyms
 in other resources
such
Linking Words
 as grants in 2017. The local tax revenue had increased by approximately 10
million
Use synonyms
, whilst the number of other resources
such
Linking Words
 as grants stabilized at about 38
million
Use synonyms
. When it comes to how the money was spent, the proportion of buildings and transport remained unchanged from 2017 to 2018 and remained at 17
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, the
budget
Use synonyms
 allocated for technology increased from 8% to 14% in 2018. Despite the salaries of officers and staff
had
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
 decreased by 6
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 still occupied the largest part in 2018.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "such".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words budget, million with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: