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Writing Samples
Band 7

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one are of Britian. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distribiuted.

The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one are of Britian. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distribiuted.
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The two pie charts and table illustrate the data on the whole
budget
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 of the police department and the distribution of expenditure in a certain area of Britain in 2017 and 2018.
Overall
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the biggest part of the police
budget
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 and the majority part of the different categories on which money was spent did not change, still being the national governments and salaries respectively.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, these two data show a slight increase respectively. As can be seen, the contribution of the national government accounted for more than half of the total
budget
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, which stood at 175.5
million
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 in 2017 and 177.8
million
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 in 2018. It was followed by 91.2
million
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 in local taxes and 38.5
million
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 in other resources
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 as grants in 2017. The local tax revenue had increased by approximately 10
million
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, whilst the number of other resources
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 as grants stabilized at about 38
million
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. When it comes to how the money was spent, the proportion of buildings and transport remained unchanged from 2017 to 2018 and remained at 17
percent
Change the spelling
per cent

The spelling of percent is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

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.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the
budget
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 allocated for technology increased from 8% to 14% in 2018. Despite the salaries of officers and staff
had
Wrong verb form
having

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb had. Consider changing it.

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 decreased by 6
percent
Change the spelling
per cent

The spelling of percent is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

show examples
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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 still occupied the largest part in 2018.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "such".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words budget, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.
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