In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countriyside is decreasing. Do you think it is a positie or nagative development?

With urbanization, the traditional face of cities has changed, and more and more

people

Use synonyms

have abandoned their villages in order to find better jobs and have a good quality of life in urban.

Thus

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

trend leads to vacant suburbs. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will determine both merits and demerits of

this

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revolution and clarify why it is a negative development. The first and perhaps the most significant advantage of migrating individuals to urban

areas

Use synonyms

is the accessibility of those

people

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to amenities and facilities that do not exist in their homeland.

To begin

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with, migrants have better career opportunities because there are more job vacancies in metropolises.

For instance

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, it is estimated that job opportunities are almost three times more in megacities compared to rural

areas

Use synonyms

Moreover

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, the number of schools, scientific institutions and universities

Change the verb form

are

show examples

noticeably more in the urban

areas

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. To illustrate, based on the survey conducted on

people

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moving to cities from rural

areas

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in 2020, immigrants pinpointed education as the main reason for their decision.

Therefore

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, leaving rural

areas

Use synonyms

has had some benefits for the public.

On the other hand

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, suburbs without any residents have affected human beings negatively. First of all, moving to rural

areas

Use synonyms

means that the agricultural workforce would decrease, and in the long term, agricultural products would fall considerably.

In addition

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, one of the most important parts of every culture would be demolished, since

people

Use synonyms

in the countryside play a vital part in preserving cultural heritage.

For example

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, Abyane which is located in the centre of Iran is empty of inhabitants and their traditions

such

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as their language and costumes are in danger of extinction.

To sum up

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, based on the arguments cited above, in my point of view, the drawbacks of

this

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trend outweigh its benefits. To restrict

this

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trend, it is the authorities' responsibility to not focus on urban

areas

Use synonyms

, and invest in suburbs to motivate inhabitants to stay there.

m.jalili1993

Aug 7, 2023

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

321 words

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