Some people believe that Internet users should be able to express any opinion online. Other people feel that governments or the companies that own websites should limit what people can say online.

#people #internet #users #governments #companies #websites #limit

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today's rapidly advancing world, the proliferation of technology has led to an ever-increasing number of individuals gaining

access

to cell phones,

consequently

leading to a parallel rise in

Internet

users.

This

trend is not confined to adults alone; even minors are gaining entry into the digital realm.

This

has sparked a debate regarding whether certain limitations should be imposed on the

content

accessible on the

Internet

While

some argue in favour of

such

restrictions, others vehemently oppose them.

While

the proponents of unrestricted online

access

contend that the

internet

should be an open platform, allowing individuals to explore the

content

of their choice,

this

stance encounters complexities when faced with real-world scenarios.

For instance

, a recent incident emerged where Canada prohibited Instagram users from accessing news pages related to Iran and its

content

This

incident raises ethical questions, as it potentially hinders the right of Iranian immigrants to stay informed about their home country. Imposing restrictions on what individuals can

access

online impinges upon their autonomy

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

unless it directly harms others. On the opposing side, the presence of harmful and inappropriate

content

on the

Internet

is undeniable, particularly when it comes to

content

unsuitable for children. Consider the example of explicit

content

or pornographic material

that is

inherently meant for mature audiences.

However

, even within

this

context, the debate is multifaceted. Age restrictions and guidelines are necessary to protect young minds from exposure to inappropriate

content

. Implementing rules and regulations to safeguard the interests of minors is not an unreasonable approach. To strike a balance, it is crucial to acknowledge both the significance of individual freedoms and the imperative of protecting children from harmful material. The youth are the future of our society and require a nurturing environment to thrive. The government and online platforms must exercise caution when disseminating

content

, as ensuring the safety and well-being of children online is paramount. Striving for a harmonious coexistence of these two perspectives is a challenge, yet one that can be achieved through thoughtful regulation and responsible

content

management. In conclusion, the ongoing dialogue surrounding online

content

access

underscores the importance of preserving personal freedoms

while

safeguarding the younger generation. Achieving a harmonious blend of both ideals necessitates careful consideration and responsible oversight by governments and digital platforms alike. By fostering an environment that respects individual choices

while

prioritizing child protection, we can ensure a more balanced and secure online landscape for everyone

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task response

Your essay provides a clear response to the task prompt, addressing both sides of the argument effectively. Make sure to maintain this balanced approach throughout the essay.

coherence cohesion

Your essay demonstrates strong coherence and cohesion, with a logical progression of ideas. To improve further, consider using more transitional phrases to connect ideas and enhance overall coherence.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

402 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that Internet users should be able to express any opinion online. Other people feel that governments or the companies that own websites should limit what people can say online.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed contries should give other types of help to the poor contries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

As a part of their education, many students work at a company for a short period of time without a salary. Are there more advantages than disadvantages to this?