Should long-term job seekers in receipt of government benefits be made to do voluntary work so that they give something back to the community? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
I believe that people looking for a long-term
job
should not return anything to the government, because every person pays taxes
and the higher the salary - the higher the taxes
. The money that is
given to people can be recovered through taxes
- for example
when the person is financially more stable - authority can take a little more for taxes
and so the government will recover its money.
On one hand, proponents argue that requiring job
seekers to participate in voluntary work fosters community engagement. Many individuals receiving government assistance face barriers to employment and volunteering can provide opportunities to acquire new skills and gain references, enhancing their employability. This
engagement can also
boost self-esteem and create sense
of purpose as Correct article usage
a sense
administration
Correct article usage
the administration
contribute
positively to their communities.
Correct subject-verb agreement
contributes
On the other hand
, mandating volunteer work may undermine the spirit of altruism. Volunteering should be a personal choice driven by the desire to help others, rather than an obligation. Additionally
, some people may already be employed and struggle to manage volunteering commitments. Moreover
, when the country's leadership focuses on a certain problem such
as its
unemployment, they believe that paying them contributions solves the problem, but it is affected more.
In conclusion, Correct pronoun usage
apply
while
community contribution is important, imposing mandatory volunteer work on job
seekers may not be the most effective approach. Supporting job
seekers in finding employment and providing them with the choice to volunteer will likely lead to more meaningful contributions and greater overall
benefits for society.Submitted by acaitaz on
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task achievement
Consider revisiting the introduction to include a more balanced view of both sides of the argument before expressing your own opinion.
task achievement
Incorporate specific examples or case studies to strengthen your argument. This will help substantiate your points and demonstrate real-world applicability.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the logical flow between paragraphs by using clearer linking words and phrases. This will improve the readability and coherence of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Review the structure of your arguments to ensure that each idea is fully developed and appropriately supported. This might involve expanding on some points or combining similar ones for a stronger impact.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the key points discussed in the essay, providing a clear stance on the issue.
task achievement
You have addressed both sides of the argument, which shows a well-rounded understanding of the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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