Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some
people
argue that
teenagers
should
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
spend
time
of their free
time
on local
community
service for free. I strongly believe that
thier
Correct your spelling
their
work in the
community
has a negative
effect
. The local
community
wants staff always. Because the
community
does not business for money and do not many
hirering
Correct your spelling
hiring
paid employee.
However
,
although
people
,including
teenagers
, wish to need
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
mass
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
,
people
wish
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
not
spend
Fix the infinitive
to spend
show examples
their free
time
.
As a result
,
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
wishes to want unpaid workers all the
time
. even if they are
teenagers
or not.
On the other hand
, in recent days,
teenagers
are very busy.
School
Add an article
The school
show examples
has very tight studies. And they go to academics after school, and
then
comeback
Correct your spelling
come back
show examples
home at about 10 PM. But, they do not end on schedule . They study
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
over night
Correct your spelling
overnight
show examples
. Really, will their
workin
Correct your spelling
work
in a
community
have
positive
Add an article
a positive
show examples
effect
on them? Youth's free
time
spent on only their own positive
effect
on them more than working in the
community
. Watching
movie
Fix the agreement mistake
movies
show examples
, reading books,
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
hobbies, making good memories, etc. The experience is very important
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
their life. They should spend more
time
on
make
Change the verb form
making
show examples
good memories.And
then
, when they grow up adults and have a more stable life,
thier
Correct your spelling
their
own will spend
timein
Correct your spelling
time in
the
community
in their free
time
. For the reasons mentioned above, I totally disagree with the opinion, because work in the
community
is necessary for society, but
teenagers
spend
Wrong verb form
spending
show examples
free
fime
Correct your spelling
time
is necessary for them. That has a good
effect
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
young
people
.
Submitted by moneekun on

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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • required
  • unpaid
  • community work
  • benefit
  • teenagers
  • life skills
  • volunteering
  • empathy
  • compassion
  • socially aware
  • responsible
  • interact
  • diverse backgrounds
  • cultural understanding
  • tolerance
  • work experience
  • essential skills
  • employment
  • interests
  • passions
  • career development
  • contribute
  • betterment
  • development
  • local community
  • mental well-being
  • stress
  • self-esteem
  • burden
  • academic
  • personal lives
  • time management
  • support
  • balance
  • participate
  • encouraged
  • numerous benefits
  • individuals
  • conclusion
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